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He's just not good enough...

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hamstrung_pigeon

hamstrung_pigeon

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Altogether now, to the Suarez song:

"He's just not good enough! He's just not good enough!"

Why we can't possibly replace Suarez with... (random guy from top 5 European leagues, under 30 years old, with at least 25 games played in 2013/2014):

30+ goals
Suarez - we just sold him
Ronaldo - do we even need to discuss this?

25 - 29 goals
Messi - see Ronaldo
Costa - just moved

20 - 24 goals
Immobile - just moved, despite the name
Sturridge - let's do a Kinnear and buy him for 40m
Lewandowski - just moved

15 - 19 goals
Tevez - hates the north east maybe
Sanchez - read the news lately?
Mandzukic - just moved
Rooney - once a blue, always a red
Aguero - and why would he leave the champions? and high wages, and injury-prone these days
Benzema - likely to re-up at Madrid; lazy and over-rated to some
Drmic - just moved
Higuain - just moved last season; over-rated to some
Aboubakar - not a big name, not a big club, big fish in poor league, too cheap
Gignac - already 28, not a big name, not a big club, big fish in poor league, too cheap
Kalou - you gotta' be kidding me
Dzeko - last year of contract but might re-up at City; big wages, why buy a better Lambert?
Yedder - not a big name, not a big club, big fish in poor league, too cheap
Llorente - just moved last season; Juve not likely to sell
Giroud - what are you smoking?
Ramos - already 28, not a big name, not a big club, too cheap
Bony - not a big name, not a big club, too cheap and too expensive, too fat
Rossi - does he still have any knees left?
Cavani - over-rated for some, high wages, Sturridge and him can't fit into the same big box
Vela - not a big name, not a big club, Arsenal reject
Beradi - heading back to Juve after a successful season at a small club; never buy Italian again!
Paulinho - not the Spurs one; some not a big name player from Livorno, already 28
Lukaku - why would Chelsea sell to us? impossible! (looks at Sturridge... oh that was a one-off), shit World Cup
Lacazette - not a big name, not a big club, big fish in poor league, too cheap
Raffael - already 29, probably too cheap, not good enough for Brazil even
Rodrguez (not James) - out till December, Southampton hates us
Okazaki - already 28, not a big name - is that some sort of new age sushi?
Gameiro - just moved last season, Sevilla wants 20m for Moreno, so likely too expensive for 15 goals
Callejon - just moved last season (a steal at 7.5m), Benitez loves him, not a prolific scorer in his career
Kiessling - already 30 (or almost, whatever)!
Pedro - over-rated for some

10 - 14 goals
whoever - we just lost 31 goals and we don't want anyone who can't score 15 goals

-----

studsup recommendation - Just wait for Yesil to heal.
 
Nice list but just another endorsement of the fact that if we are looking for another striker there are none proven that are within reach other than Remy, Bony and Higuian .. other than taking a chance on someone unproven or we think can step up from the 10-14 bracket.
 
Frogfish said:
Nice list but just another endorsement of the fact that if we are looking for another striker there are none proven that are within reach other than Remy, Bony and Higuian .. other than taking a chance on someone unproven or we think can step up from the 10-14 bracket.
Click to expand...

I've to qualify though, that the list comprises names only from the top 5 leagues, so omits guys in the leagues in Portugal, the Netherlands, Russia, etc. But yeah, as far as the top 5 leagues are concerned, the list is pretty short. Once you take out the ones who are unavailable or impossible, we're mainly left with the ones with some doubts, the lesser-knowns, the unknowns and the untouchables.

Actually, there are quite some popular names in the under 15 list, not least of which are Remy (14), and Muller (13). And of course, Falcao scored only 9 due to his injury, Rodriguez (the James) scored only 9, and so did Neymar. But the last 3 all fall under the impossible zone I guess.

I was taking the piss a bit with that "do not want anyone < 15 goals" part. 😀 But you can imagine there will be some outrage if we took a 9-goal scorer for say, 18m.
 
Of that third category list...

Ruled Out:
Tevez, Rooney, Aguero, Dzeko, Giroud, Llorente, Cavani, Higuain = Already at a big club, big wages, rivals, impossible.
Mandzukic, Sanchez, Drmic, Ramos = Already Moved
Gignac, Kiessling, Okazaki, Paulinho = Too old and not good enough
Rossi = Injury Prone
Rodriguez, Callejon = Coming off big seasons so will cost much more than they're worth.

Potentially:
Pedro, Benzema = Could be viable, but will be pricey
Ben Yedder, Berardi, Aboubakar, Lacazette = Been linked to some of these, could be smart young low profile signings.
Bony, Vela, Lukaku = High quality established players, will cost a decent amount.
Raffael, Kalou, Gameiro = Cheap, older players who could contribute. Smart at the right price, good squad options.

Ramos actually already moved to Dortmund in a smart move, good business by them. We were heavily linked with Lacazette early in this window. Raffael could be a really clever squad addition, and is boss on FIFA.
 
Thanks for the update, Whirly. I actually don't even know who Ramos is. 😀

By the way, my original post was meant to be a little tongue-in-cheek as well, but I'm not sure my attempt at humour came off well.

It does, however (I think!), show that options are pretty limited if people don't want us to buy non-big-names, non-big-clubbers, non-big-leaguers, non-30m-to-40m-players, and possibly-non-Sturridge-compatible-models.
 
studsup said:
Thanks for the update, Whirly. I actually don't even know who Ramos is. 😀

By the way, my original post was meant to be a little tongue-in-cheek as well, but I'm not sure my attempt at humour came off well.

It does, however (I think!), show that options are pretty limited if people don't want us to buy non-big-names, non-big-clubbers, non-big-leaguers, non-30m-to-40m-players, and possibly-non-Sturridge-compatible-models.
Click to expand...



You forget that most people tend to overrate what they know, and thankfully don't have any actual input on our transfer policy. Ramos would have been a solid signing for us, for example.

We can talk ourselves into any player though, so we'll all be fine.
 
Just as a bonus and because it's a boring Saturday afternoon, I was looking at the top-scoring forwards / midfielders who're under 20, across the top 5 European leagues, and who played at least 15 games.

These are the top three:
1. (FW) Domenico Barrardi (19) for Sassuolo, on loan from Juve, easily stood out with 16 goals in 29 games.
2. (AM) Hakan Calhanglu (20) for Hamburg, with 11 in 32; just moved to Leverkusen for 14.5m euros
3. (AM/WF) Raheem Sterling (19), with 9 goals in 33 games, playing as a wide forward or attacking central mid.

Gwan.

I have brought this up many times but haven't seen anyone agree or disagree, so I'm not sure if I'm the only one who really thinks Sterling can be a central striker for us and would be the closest thing we have to Sturridge right now.

If we only manage to get Bony, we'd then have 2 similar strikers of each type - Sturridge/Sterling and Bony/Lambert. With us beefing up in wide forward / attacking mid and with the potential for Ibe to surprise, moving Sterling up doesn't really leave a gap anymore, unlike last season.
 
I think Sterling could play the position, but he's much better used deeper. It's easier to find a 15 goal striker than a 10 goal winger/AM IMO.
 
Cuzzee we need to be watching Moneyball again.
We cant replace Suarez with a 30 goal player, that player doesnt exist.
What we can do is spend the money on 3 players who between them NET in defense or attack equate to 30+ goals.

We sold Ian Rush after a 40 goal season and brought in Aldridge, Barnes and Beardsley.
Thats exactly what we need to do.
Not gonna be easy obviously but we pay people a lot of money to find these players.
Obviously I would like Benzema and Griezmann (now Iturbe is out of the picture) to go along with Lallana
I think that would be an improvement
Benzema
Sturridge
Coutinho
Lallana
Sterling
Greizmann
 
Couldn't find anywhere else to put this.

10537093_10152290378508845_9004652752184945441_n.jpg
 
Great thread. Especially if it stops knobheads talking about this in the Bony is boss thread.

The footie hipster choice seems to be Kevin Volland. I have no idea if he is any good as I do not watch the Bundesliga.
 
Get Thomas Muller. Problem solved. Young and proven goalscorer. Whoever disagree is a twat.

40mil bid to Bayern. Still left 30+ mil of Suarez's sale fund to play with.
 
Glockette said:
Get Thomas Muller. Problem solved. Young and proven goalscorer. Whoever disagree is a twat.

40mil bid to Bayern. Still left 30+ mil of Suarez's sale fund to play with.
Click to expand...
I doubt muller would leave Bayern, as he's a consistent starter and a boss.
 
Fabio said:
I doubt muller would leave Bayern, as he's a consistent starter and a boss.
Click to expand...


If every club has doubt of not signing a top player they would become a Zimbabwean football club.

Show them the money. Money is all that matters. If we don't bid, we will not fucking know.
 
Glockette said:
If every club has doubt of not signing a top player they would become a Zimbabwean football club.

Show them the money. Money is all that matters. If we don't bid, we will not fucking know.
Click to expand...
We couldn't afford him.
 
Glockette said:
Hilarious! He is valued at around 40-50mil. Just show Bayern the money and 130k a week for Muller.
Click to expand...
130k?you taking the piss? It'd take more than double that.

Amazingly it's more than just money to get a player, as Sanchez proved.

If you think football is Championship manager then you need to stop posting with the big boys
 
So just to be fair to a few youngsters who've been mentioned but didn't make it to the list (because they scored fewer than 15 goals being so young), I looked at the list of forwards who're 23 and under, and who played at least 20 games. Some pretty impressive goals / game stats there.

Player Club Games Goals Goals/Game Remark
Destro Roma 20 13 0.65
Lasogga Hamburg 20 13 0.65
Berardi Sassuolo 29 16 0.55 on loan from Juve in 2013/14
Drmic Nurnberg 33 17 0.52 just moved to Leverkusen (6.8m euro)
Lukaku Everton 32 15 0.47 on loan from Chelsea in 2013/14
Aboubakar Lorient 35 16 0.46
Lacazetta Lyon 36 15 0.42
Icardi Inter 22 9 0.41

Interestingly, on a per game basis, Morata scores about once every 3 games (8 goals in 23 games for Real Madrid). However, measured on a per 90-min basis (i.e. actual time played), he's very impressive at 1.24 goals every 90 minutes. When you pit that number against that of the senior players, he even leads Ronaldo, Messi, Aguero, Rossi (!), Suarez, Ibrahimovic, Sturridge, Costa and Mandzukic. Rumoured to be joining Juve, with 22m euros being suggested.

Destro (Roma) is not too shabby in that regard too, coming in just behind Ronaldo, Messi and Aguero. Lasogga (Hamburg) just comes after Mandzukic.

Stats, shmats.
 
Fabio said:
130k?you taking the piss? It'd take more than double that.

Amazingly it's more than just money to get a player, as Sanchez proved.

If you think football is Championship manager then you need to stop posting with the big boys
Click to expand...


Do you fucking know what you're talking about? What does Sanchez proved btw?

Muller's salary isn't that high. You know fuck all about anything. I suggest you stay low and why don't you go take a walk.

If the club have an attitude like yours we wouldn't be signing anyone. We have plenty of money available after Suarez left and we want to win trophies this season. We need to show everyone that we have the intention in signing best players not selling them.

No player is as good as Suarez but we need to find someone near as good, and Muller is the best bet.

I don't give a flying fuck whatever salary he's getting, 50mil max should get him.
 
See, here you are being lovely and reductionist

Sanchez didn't want to come to us, not because of money or club status, but for location reasons.

By all means we should enquire, but we've got no chance in hell of even getting to the stage of personal terms.

You're just being OHLETSBUYHIMCOSHESGOOD

You're not grounded in any sort of realism. Which I knew anyway, what with your whole shtick of thinking you're intelligent
 
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