I've been severely reprimanded for my lack of RAAAATTTTTIIINNNGS for the Spurs game, even though I was actually in Liverpool over the weekend and I was sort of busy-ish doing family stuff, but anyway, to (slightly) make up for it, I thought I'd give everyone a little Bitter update, from everyone's favourite Woe Factory, Grand Old Team.
It's always much better perusing it when a defeat has (almost inevitably) followed on from a morale-boosting, corner-turning display; in this case losing 3-2 to Brighton after an excellent display and result vs West Ham.
Obviously, the two main antagonists are Jordan Pickford and Marco Silva. We'll start with Jordan, shall we?
Rarely has a player so split the fanbase. It's so unfair! Expectations are too high, especially with his price-tag, tender age and position as Everton and England Number One!
"The dog's abuse this lad gets from certain corners of our fanbase. Just weird. It's like in order to be a top class keeper you can never let in a goal!"
" I thought his 83rd minute save was reminiscent of that famous, World Cup, Gordon Banks save against Pele. Pickfords' heroics against West Ham kept us in the game"
But such are the vicissitudes of life as Jordan Pickford, that this sentiment can cruelly change so very, very quickly!
"Baby-armed bellend"
That's more like it.
"I'm sure next time his beloved ingerlund play he will be full of concentration again. Useless turd. Doesn't help that he comes across as an absolute tosser either."
"This tit can pack his bags as well"
"One of our most overrated players of all time. Heaving garbage."
Oh dear. Maybe next week will be better, eh Jordy? I'm not sure how Michael Keane's getting on these days, let's have a quick look:
"Keane is useless and it's just a constant wave of sloppy defending leading to goals, absolutely hate him me, even his little face like he's about to sob into his hands makes me hate him more"
"Must have another life threatening foot injury again"
"Marie Antoinette could head a ball better than this bloke"
*slams door shut* Erm......moving on. How about some positivity? That Andre Gomes fella has been a hit. Ex-Barca, big money signing. Quite the coup!
"Pathetic"
Oh.
"He hides because he plays the simple 20 yard, sideways and backwards ball, especially away from home. He has no heart to truly grab a game.
He is also always a defensive liability"
"He’s a one good game in ten player"
One poster gets into the Halloween spirit:
"The ghost who walks. 90 mins passing sideways over 5 yards and doing nothing else. Passenger".
Might not be all Gomes's fault, though. It's not all bad news:
"It's hard to play well alongside Delph."
Oh. Maybe it is all bad news. Still, Tom Davies is one of theirs isn't he? And he came back into the team to get many MOM awards against the 'ammers. Nice to see the kids come good, even if nothing else seems to be going as well as it might!
"To be honest, I think he's an appalling player. But ultimately he isn't to blame today".
Yeah, let's not blame Tom!
"Simply not good enough. Being young and Scouse doesn't make you good enough"
OK, let's blame Tom, but at least try and be constructive!
"He was turbo gash"
Blimey. Well, let's try and leave GOT on a high note....anyone got anything nice to say about the manager? anyone? Anyone? Bueller?
Aha! Someone seems to be cynical about the fact that, you know, Silva has actually won two of his last three games!
"Get ready for the dullards in the fanbase "DER CORNER HAS BEEN TURNED LAD!!"
This next post appears to be some kind of highly-evolved parody account:
"I don’t go to the match, I’ve hardly seen any of our highlights this season, I seriously can’t be arsed with Everton because they’re a bunch of losers, from the owners right down to the tea lady. BUT it’s obvious that O’Silver has turned the corner and should be given time. Obvious".
However, the last word must go to GwladysStLad, who seems a bit resigned and sad (and angry and bitter, obvs)
"Its an utter embarrassment that he's still here. He's a clown who's so far out of his depth that its a joke.
Silva is totally clueless, part of that match was as bad as anything I've ever watched at Goodison. There's no justifying this now, if Silva was BFS he'd be getting none stop abuse and he certainly wouldn't keep getting this pass by some of our fans"
