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Post match

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One of the best weekends of my life that. Woland’s done with everything now so you won’t see him again. We broke him.
 
Plane home from Warsaw, he gives his phone to the taxi driver as a tip. Doesn’t want any sort of outside communication anymore. That says it all. You’ll never hear from him again.
 
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We’ve had all the drugs and all the ale, and yeah it’s just been boss. Fuck the match. Plenty more to go haven’t we.

RIP WOLAND
 
As usual, I've avoided any Liverpool FC discussion on and off-line, and I didn't post here at all over the weekend, or during the usual pre and post-match blathering. I always skulk away to lick my wounds after a game like Saturday. I never really felt all that confident anyway, and the match itself was largely a dismal, disappointing affair.

However, enough time has passed, so that my usual dispassionate, forensic summary of the match and performance can be enjoyed by everyone, without any of the fevered emotional ranting from other Forum members spoiling it.

First of all, I'm not going to dissect the match and what we did right or wrong. We've done that. There's also little point in blaming Ramos, or ranting about "the dark arts". He's a winner, and they won. Yet again. Of course, he's a horrible, dirty cheating cunt and I hope his hands wither and he goes blind. But why wallow in hate and misery?

What's more important is what we do next, and how serial final loser Klopp can change his abysmal record in cups. It's almost embarrassing, really. But weirdly, I feel confident that, given some clever recruiting this summer, we can take another run at glory.

Anyway, later than usual, but better than ever: THE RAAAAAAAAAATINGSSSSS!

Karius (1) I'm not sure what the general consensus about Karius is (or rather, was), but I've never been confident in him. There's always an error, or stupid decision waiting nervously for its grand entrance. Indeed, we saw plenty of them in the games against City and Roma, in which his brainless distribution and flappy-handed shitness almost cost us dearly. And any cursory glance at match threads will back that up, with words like "flawed", "mong", "weak", "lucky" and "shite" all used to describe his displays against Rome, City, Stoke and West Brom in recent weeks. Admittedly they're all by me, but I can't have been the only one. Anyway, I don't think it's fair to blame this loss entirely on Karius.... just almost entirely, the useless fucking cunt. I hope he never plays for us again.

TAA (7) Didn't do much wrong, in a decent display. Had one good effort well saved and dealt with Real's threat confidently.

Lovren (8) Arguably the pick pf our defenders, and gave one of his best displays, the oft-maligned Croat won most of his battles and was dominant throughout, including a crucial role on the goal.

Virgil (7) A subdued Ronaldo paid testament to VVD's solid dispplay, with some basic "Row Z" defending when needed. Not quite as nerveless and in control as his can be, but can't really be held to account for the goals we conceded.

Robertson (7) A typically lung-bursting display, and flew into tackles before launching himself up the pitch to help in attack. But was pinned back much more in the second half, as we collectively ceded territory. Can't do it all on his own, but that's what we expected in the second half, as he was the preferred outlet.

Wijnaldum (6) Started well, and was clever and controlled in possession, but there's no higher gear. No inspiration, or moment of genius, so when we struggled to attack Real, all he had in his locker was "pass to Robertson".

Milner (6) Typically Trojan-esque workrate, and was covering the hard yards most of the game, but was too reactive and couldn't exert enough control or influence when we needed it, which was a collective failing of the entire midfield. Corner led to goal, after Lovren's great header caused chaos.

Henderson (6). Really flew at Real in the opening 20 minutes, closing down the space and not allowing Real any time. But as the gaps grew wider, he reverted to his "Fireman With A Leaky Bucket" routine, dashing around trying to douse flames, and not doing it well enough.

Salah (6) Oh God. What could have been? What would have been? We shall never know, but one suspects that if we'd had our best player on the pitch for 90 minutes, we'd have done better. All hope disappeared with him.

Mane (8). The one player who never gave up, and was a constant threat with his pace, skill and attacking ability. Scored one, hit the post and was the best attacking player in Red. Well played Sadio.

Firmino (3). Shit. Never got into the game, and Real must have been delighted that he stayed on the pitch, and Salah went off. Sloppy in possession, no pace and offered almost zero goal threat.

Subs:

Lallana (4). Hardly fair on him that we replaced our best player with...Adam Lallana, but that's the difference between top clubs that win trophies and Liverpool. They brought on Gareth Bale. Did fuck all, and his horrible lack of speed around the pitch was evident
 
^^ like when you go to the hairdresser and the cunt feels the need to comment on your “heaps of grey hair mate”

Cheers fuckhead, I’d forgotten about it for a minute and was kinda hoping your smart-arseness wouldn’t come up.
 
As usual, I've avoided any Liverpool FC discussion on and off-line, and I didn't post here at all over the weekend, or during the usual pre and post-match blathering. I always skulk away to lick my wounds after a game like Saturday. I never really felt all that confident anyway, and the match itself was largely a dismal, disappointing affair.

However, enough time has passed, so that my usual dispassionate, forensic summary of the match and performance can be enjoyed by everyone, without any of the fevered emotional ranting from other Forum members spoiling it.

First of all, I'm not going to dissect the match and what we did right or wrong. We've done that. There's also little point in blaming Ramos, or ranting about "the dark arts". He's a winner, and they won. Yet again. Of course, he's a horrible, dirty cheating cunt and I hope his hands wither and he goes blind. But why wallow in hate and misery?

What's more important is what we do next, and how serial final loser Klopp can change his abysmal record in cups. It's almost embarrassing, really. But weirdly, I feel confident that, given some clever recruiting this summer, we can take another run at glory.

Anyway, later than usual, but better than ever: THE RAAAAAAAAAATINGSSSSS!

Karius (1) I'm not sure what the general consensus about Karius is (or rather, was), but I've never been confident in him. There's always an error, or stupid decision waiting nervously for its grand entrance. Indeed, we saw plenty of them in the games against City and Roma, in which his brainless distribution and flappy-handed shitness almost cost us dearly. And any cursory glance at match threads will back that up, with words like "flawed", "mong", "weak", "lucky" and "shite" all used to describe his displays against Rome, City, Stoke and West Brom in recent weeks. Admittedly they're all by me, but I can't have been the only one. Anyway, I don't think it's fair to blame this loss entirely on Karius.... just almost entirely, the useless fucking cunt. I hope he never plays for us again.

TAA (7) Didn't do much wrong, in a decent display. Had one good effort well saved and dealt with Real's threat confidently.

Lovren (8) Arguably the pick pf our defenders, and gave one of his best displays, the oft-maligned Croat won most of his battles and was dominant throughout, including a crucial role on the goal.

Virgil (7) A subdued Ronaldo paid testament to VVD's solid dispplay, with some basic "Row Z" defending when needed. Not quite as nerveless and in control as his can be, but can't really be held to account for the goals we conceded.

Robertson (7) A typically lung-bursting display, and flew into tackles before launching himself up the pitch to help in attack. But was pinned back much more in the second half, as we collectively ceded territory. Can't do it all on his own, but that's what we expected in the second half, as he was the preferred outlet.

Wijnaldum (6) Started well, and was clever and controlled in possession, but there's no higher gear. No inspiration, or moment of genius, so when we struggled to attack Real, all he had in his locker was "pass to Robertson".

Milner (6) Typically Trojan-esque workrate, and was covering the hard yards most of the game, but was too reactive and couldn't exert enough control or influence when we needed it, which was a collective failing of the entire midfield. Corner led to goal, after Lovren's great header caused chaos.

Henderson (6). Really flew at Real in the opening 20 minutes, closing down the space and not allowing Real any time. But as the gaps grew wider, he reverted to his "Fireman With A Leaky Bucket" routine, dashing around trying to douse flames, and not doing it well enough.

Salah (6) Oh God. What could have been? What would have been? We shall never know, but one suspects that if we'd had our best player on the pitch for 90 minutes, we'd have done better. All hope disappeared with him.

Mane (8). The one player who never gave up, and was a constant threat with his pace, skill and attacking ability. Scored one, hit the post and was the best attacking player in Red. Well played Sadio.

Firmino (3). Shit. Never got into the game, and Real must have been delighted that he stayed on the pitch, and Salah went off. Sloppy in possession, no pace and offered almost zero goal threat.

Subs:

Lallana (4). Hardly fair on him that we replaced our best player with...Adam Lallana, but that's the difference between top clubs that win trophies and Liverpool. They brought on Gareth Bale. Did fuck all, and his horrible lack of speed around the pitch was evident
Agree with nearly all that. Thought Gini tried really hard to get forward but apart from Mane he had very few options to pass as Firminio just vanished and fuck knows where Lallana was all game.
 
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