Oh well. May as well do some fucking RAAAAAAAAAAAAAATTTTINGS then.
More than a few of us saw this coming. So much hype, so much expectation; "the worst United side in a generation"; Injury-hit and depleted; Liverpool on an unstoppable march towards the title, with a flawless start to the season......really, what did anyone expect to happen? I was just relieved to get the point.
And a point was about as much as we deserved. We were fucking dreadful. Klopp might moan and bitch about VAR and United being defensive - much to Mourinho's amusement in the commentary box, as he quipped about Klopp's dislike of "the menu" - but it's his job to find a way around "the low block" which is apparently what we're calling "sitting back and playing defensive, counter-attacking football" now.
But it's accurate. If you sit a player on Fabinho, deny Firmino space and make our full-backs actually defend, we have to rely entirely on Mane or Salah, and we didn't even have Salah, who was badly missed. Our midfield is, as we all know, hard-working and disciplined, but almost entirely lacking in attacking creativity when denied time or obvious targets to hit (usually a player overlapping out wide). There's no magic, so we get into a gruelling war of attrition. And it didn't work. There was finally some creativity and movement when Klopp threw on Lallana, Keita and Chamberlain, and that duly got us the equaliser, but any opposition manager watching will have been taking plenty of notes.
Alisson (6) Not exactly over-worked on his return, had little chance with the goal. Nice to have the Big Beardy Grock back.
TAA (4) The full-backs were both made to do a bit of defending in the first half as Rashford and James kept running at them, and he looked ragged at times. There was less attacking to deal with as the game went on, but TAA's passing and crossing was all over the place like a pissed tramp's breakfast
Matip (4) Passing caused us problems early on, and then he was turned over by Rashford, so it was a game he won't want to remember. He kept playing it just too short, or too long, and looked like he was wearing clown boots at times as he tried to keep up with their attackers. Got better as the game went on, but that's because they stopped running at him.
Virgil (6) Probably our best player, even if he wasn't at his best, and actually seemed to look very slightly ruffled by Rashford on one or two occasions. His pace and mobility was vital and kept United to very few chances.
Robertson (6) Another who wasn't at his best, he was still more solid than TAA and also got more joy in attack, helping create the equaliser with a good low cross that (eventually) got to Lallana.
Fabinho (4) Terrible first half, and did not enjoy the attentions of Perreira, who is a limited footballer but has quick feet and can get about the pitch well: he just ran in straight lines up and down the middle of the pitch, annoying Firmino when he dropped deep, and Fabinho when he tried to come forward, nullifying both. Fabinho's usual aggression and passing were both undercooked and he looked ungainly and off-balance when he was passing (badly). Lost the battle.
Henderson (3) At his best, Henderson is like a chocolate Lab - a bit thick, but so energetic and full of fun. You can play fetch with him all day, and he'll come back wagging his tail with the ball. This game was the equivalent of throwing a bag of shit, and then beating him with a stick when he brought it back. He looked forlorn. He tried to find space and moved around the pitch (high, wide right, central), but his lack of guile and creativity was horribly exposed.
Wijnaldum (6) He was easily our best player in a turgid and wretched first half, even if his flashes of skill typically ended up with absolutely zero end product (I know he plays in a different position for Holland, but why can't he fucking shoot straight in a Liverpool shirt?). He went missing in the second half, though. <Like "is he still on the pitch?" missing
Origi (3) Fucking hell, this cunt couldn't trap a bag of fucking cement. He is so far away from being good enough to play for Liverpool, it's almost hilarious. At very best he can be your classic "impact sub" because he runs quite fast and if he has a swing at the ball in the box, he might score. But even then, the problem is that sometimes "impact subs" have to start games. Like this one. You can't be starting players like Origi if you want to win the title.
Mane (5) Had a goal disallowed, but that was about all he did. He seemed weirdly passive, even faced with that ancient horrible cunt Young and glacier-like slab-headed twat Maguire, Mane just didn't attack them - even if he could easily outpace both. Why? Why do you make me sad, Sadio?
Firmino (3) He's not in the side to score goals (thankfully), so I suppose it's hard to get too angry at his two timid half-hearted efforts, but there was fuck all else. His touch was as delicate as a crack-head rapist in a convent; he was passing to anyone but our players and his flicks and tricks were aimless and lazy. He didn't even do his usual shift in terms of workrate, and just plodded slowly around the pitch. Truly abysmal.
Subs:
Lallana (7) I'm not his biggest fan - is anyone? - but he at least, cliche alert, offered us something different. And scored the equaliser! So have an extra point.
Keita (6) Reading some of the comments you'd think Keita came on, tore United to shreds, made the equaliser and scored a screamer to snatch three points. But no, although apparently he done a clever "no-look" pass! Wow. What he did do was actually pass accurately and forwards, which in the context of everything around him, was actually quite impressive.
Chamberlain (5) I would have given him a 6, like Keita, because at least he had a decent shot just wide, and added a bit of impetus. But he's still a brainless twat, and he gets a point taken off for that fucking retarded pass late on that was so retarded, everyone watching immediately dropped one IQ point.
