• You may have to login or register before you can post and view our exclusive members only forums.
    To start viewing messages, select the forum that you want to visit from the selection below.

Benteke - BOOOOOO the puns

Forums Unread posts
Sheik Yerbouti said:
Hahahaha. Fuck off headwand.
Click to expand...

I'll remember this one. I also remember Benteke had his little spell of shifting it and shooting from outside the box. Don't hold your breath on that working again after defenders have long since figured that one out. The rest of his goals, when he isn't going through several month long lean spells, are headers. Don't hold your breath for that either in our team.

All you'll get to see is a technically inferior version of Balotelli.
 
The point is at least he can pass. Benteke is a limited footballer who scored against us a few times, and so of course rather than take that as a sign of our shitness, we take it as a sign of a £32m goalscorer. Sorry £32.5m.
 
He's not a limited footballer. Thats just insane to even suggest.

Only 3 players have scored more goals than him in the league in the last 3 years.
That puts him beyond being just ok aswell.

Big question marks about how he'll fit in, but Rodgers have been after him for a long time, he's our top target and we'll just have to trust Rodgers on this one.
There shouldnt be any question marks about his ability in general or infront of goal.
 
Anyone moaning about wasting the sterling money wanna have a cash bet about who gets the most goals and assists next year out of that little shitcunt and bentekkers?
 
I've been trying to work out what Brodge is thinking with this signing (from a positive perspective), I'll roll with that later. In the meantime...

1. I was really enjoying that Peter/D-Mac quarrel until D-Mac went with the 'I've spoken to people who I won't name, but who've met you and claim you're a dick in real life' line. Was I the only one who cringed at that? Seriously? That's a bit low for my liking. You can roll with all the 'fucking prick/pseudo-intellectual' shit all you like cos it's meaningless, but that's a bit personal for my liking. Plus, who are the fucking knobheads who were happy enough to meet Peter, have a beer with him, and then go and call him out to some other random on this site behind his back? Have a look at yourself.

2. If, and it's a big if, Sturridge gets fit, what's BR's plan? Those two up front? Without going all 'best 11', surely you don't spend 32.5M on a striker to sit him on the bench, and if Sturridge is fit he plays. So is he going 4-4-2? I don't get that.
 
dantes said:
The point is at least he can pass. Benteke is a limited footballer who scored against us a few times, and so of course rather than take that as a sign of our shitness, we take it as a sign of a £32m goalscorer. Sorry £32.5m.
Click to expand...
I'm not posting this happy about signing Benteke. Not cos I think he's shit, he scored 1 in 2 for a shit Villa team but like Ryan I wonder how he fits in. The only technical ability Mario Aren't I Dead Mad Balotelli has is setting up a good firework display
 
Ryan said:
I've been trying to work out what Brodge is thinking with this signing (from a positive perspective), I'll roll with that later. In the meantime...

1. I was really enjoying that Peter/D-Mac quarrel until D-Mac went with the 'I've spoken to people who I won't name, but who've met you and claim you're a dick in real life' line. Was I the only one who cringed at that? Seriously? That's a bit low for my liking. You can roll with all the 'fucking prick/pseudo-intellectual' shit all you like cos it's meaningless, but that's a bit personal for my liking. Plus, who are the fucking knobheads who were happy enough to meet Peter, have a beer with him, and then go and call him out to some other random on this site behind his back? Have a look at yourself.

2. If, and it's a big if, Sturridge gets fit, what's BR's plan? Those two up front? Without going all 'best 11', surely you don't spend 32.5M on a striker to sit him on the bench, and if Sturridge is fit he plays. So is he going 4-4-2? I don't get that.
Click to expand...

1. I kinda like D-Mac's left-field jibe as it raised the stakes in a slanging match in danger of getting boring - but didn't for one minute think it was true. Now you've made me weigh that up... is there a eurovision style ranking thing going on that I didn't know about?

2. We did play with two strikers in the most successful season we've had in aeons quite recently.
 
Woland said:
1. I kinda like D-Mac's left-field jibe as it raised the stakes in a slanging match in danger of getting boring - but didn't for one minute think it was true. Now you've made me weigh that up... is there a eurovision style ranking thing going on that I didn't know about?

2. We did play with two strikers in the most successful season we've had in aeons quite recently.
Click to expand...


1. We'll if it's going to be accepted as the norm that we rank and rate the members of the site, all-on-the-table-style, then so be it. It'd give D-Mac's isolated effort some support I guess. Although we've then got a different site altogethor.

2. Brodge didn't even want to do that. He's a straight up and down 4-3-3 man, and fought against the two up top for as long as he could, but then when Suarez became player-manager in his last season, Brodge just stepped out of the way. I can't believe he wants to go back to that.
 
Well I reckon that a front three of Benteke, Coutinho and Sturridge when fit and Firmino when not in front of Milner, Henderson and Can sounds pretty boss.

But I guess we'll have to see.
 
This has got me worried now Woland... We've met each other. You haven't thrown me under the bus to some nomarks off this site too have you?

If so, I'm about to bring cunts down all over this place if that's the game you're advocating.
 
In signing Benteke's he's effectively replacing Sturridge and sending a signal to him that he will no longer be the main man at the club. That's fair enough given his injury record and the fact Rodgers job is at risk. I'm not necessary sure it's the right move for the club, though. This smacks of a manager trying to cling onto another year rather than a smart investment made by the club. The next manager is going to have to inherit a pick-n-mix strike-force rather than one the product of a vision.
 
I
Ryan said:
I've been trying to work out what Brodge is thinking with this signing (from a positive perspective), I'll roll with that later. In the meantime...

1. I was really enjoying that Peter/D-Mac quarrel until D-Mac went with the 'I've spoken to people who I won't name, but who've met you and claim you're a dick in real life' line. Was I the only one who cringed at that? Seriously? That's a bit low for my liking. You can roll with all the 'fucking prick/pseudo-intellectual' shit all you like cos it's meaningless, but that's a bit personal for my liking. Plus, who are the fucking knobheads who were happy enough to meet Peter, have a beer with him, and then go and call him out to some other random on this site behind his back? Have a look at yourself.

2. If, and it's a big if, Sturridge gets fit, what's BR's plan? Those two up front? Without going all 'best 11', surely you don't spend 32.5M on a striker to sit him on the bench, and if Sturridge is fit he plays. So is he going 4-4-2? I don't get that.
Click to expand...

Re - #2: I think we may play 4-4-2 a lot (with a diamond), but only one of Benteke or Sturridge will play with Origi or Ings or Firmino alongside. I think people are giving Sturridge too much respect. I love Daniel, but he can't play more than once a week and is streaky player at best and lazy at worst. Benteke has his merits and his drawbacks, but I have never thought of him as lazy. He will work his ass off and if he gets service, he will score goals.

I have convinced myself that I like this deal - maybe for my own psychological reasons. But, Benteke will offer something different without being a big lump up front. He has pace, makes good runs and works his socks off. I would love Daniel to be fit and firing and making it hard for Benteke to get on the field. That would be great!! But, if he is not, Benteke offers a lot that Origi and Ings do not.
 
Ryan said:
I've been trying to work out what Brodge is thinking with this signing (from a positive perspective), I'll roll with that later. In the meantime...

1. I was really enjoying that Peter/D-Mac quarrel until D-Mac went with the 'I've spoken to people who I won't name, but who've met you and claim you're a dick in real life' line. Was I the only one who cringed at that? Seriously? That's a bit low for my liking. You can roll with all the 'fucking prick/pseudo-intellectual' shit all you like cos it's meaningless, but that's a bit personal for my liking. Plus, who are the fucking knobheads who were happy enough to meet Peter, have a beer with him, and then go and call him out to some other random on this site behind his back? Have a look at yourself.

2. If, and it's a big if, Sturridge gets fit, what's BR's plan? Those two up front? Without going all 'best 11', surely you don't spend 32.5M on a striker to sit him on the bench, and if Sturridge is fit he plays. So is he going 4-4-2? I don't get that.
Click to expand...


I don't mind him saying that, if he wants to.

Those big group meetings in Liverpool are so crowded you really don't get to know any one person, it's all superficial. So anyone saying that from that meeting is just sounding off, essentially. If it's any of the people I know better from London then well I guess that says more about them than me, seeing as we're all friends there.

And if he made it up then that's really pretty pathetic. Whatever.
 
I really really dont want Benteke.

I actually want us to keep the cash. This season every team seems to be spending the new tv money. It may be more strategic to hang on to the cash, given that we have made some prudent signings early doors.

If the likes of Lucas, Borini and Balo or shipped out, then we can go and get a DM first and look at a striker after.

If a big opportunity like siging Lacazette or Aubamayang etc comes around we should be in for it....but Benteki is not in that list of players for me.
 
I had to wade back into the putrid morass of everyone's opinion of Benteke to see this Doctor Mac V peter Hague fight and it was a total fucking letdown. They attacked each other's intellect, vanity and ability to make a good impression in novel social settings.

Nothing about class, parentage, sexual proclivities or shortcomings, income, country of origin, etc.

They didn't even bother spending hours researching each other's posts to reveal contradictions or ludicrously inaccurate old predictions as evidence of the other's idiocy.

I'll give them both a D minus.

Must try harder.
 
You've opened up an interesting topic there Gene... What's the most epic argument we've ever had on the site?
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Similar threads

bluebell
The new CB?
Replies
14
Views
401
darkstarexodus
darkstarexodus
Brizzle
    • Like
Pre Match Pre Match - Man City (H) - Sun 16:00
15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23
Replies
674
Views
11K
rubans
rubans
bluebell
  • Locked
Big Hungarian Dom
Replies
3
Views
153
Farkmaster
Farkmaster
SummerOnions
Ticket(s) for boxing day leicester
Replies
0
Views
76
SummerOnions
SummerOnions
Brizzle
    • Like
  • Locked
Pre Match Pre Match - Aston Villa (H) - Sat 20:00
2 3
Replies
61
Views
1K
binomial
binomial
Back
Top Bottom