Swingers & swinging...

Oncey's Poll


  • Total voters
    39
[quote author=Whaddapie link=topic=24077.msg587314#msg587314 date=1212522471]
And we're not gonna take it any more, Limey!
[/quote]

Here here!

** load noise gathers down the back and suddenly a voice shouts "Fucking hell"**
 
[quote author=Rosco link=topic=24077.msg587315#msg587315 date=1212522557]
Foureyes can you explain how the mention of onion bhajees is racist ?

I don't get it.
[/quote]

Please! You have the power to stop this!!
 
[quote author=Spionkop69 link=topic=24077.msg587347#msg587347 date=1212524056]
[quote author=Rosco link=topic=24077.msg587315#msg587315 date=1212522557]
Foureyes can you explain how the mention of onion bhajees is racist ?

I don't get it.
[/quote]

Please! You have the power to stop this!!
[/quote]

Honestly Spion I'd like to know.

If somebody called me a spudmuncher I wouldn't consider it racist. An old stereotype ? Yes, but not racist.

I think there is a difference.
 
As do I, but 4I's point is that as soon as it became apparant that he was offended by the comment, roger's refusal to apologise and his decision to continue with that line of 'humour' then made the comments racist becasue he was aware that the 'offendee' considered them such...

... your honour.
 
[quote author=Whaddapie link=topic=24077.msg587357#msg587357 date=1212524420]
As do I, but 4I's point is that as soon as it became apparant that he was offended by the comment, roger's refusal to apologise and his decision to continue with that line of 'humour' then made the comments racist becasue he was aware that the 'offendee' considered them such...

... your honour.
[/quote]

heh ... you just reminded me that I'm kinda sticking up for Rog here, and while I think he was an idiot here I still don't think the comment was (or can be considering he is asian himself) racist
 
[quote author=Hardcastle link=topic=24077.msg587281#msg587281 date=1212520715]
To be fair Foureyes mate, I think you've overreacted a fair bit there.

Roger being a fucktard is a given, even so I don't think what he said is that bad.
[/quote]

His comment was meant as an insult with racial undertones. I didn't get too pissed off by it initially as you can see by my first response to him HC. But the dumb fuk kept on pushing after I had asked him not to. That's what really wound me up. If you made a wise crack in jest at a new poster on the site and they politely mentioned the fact that they took offence and explained why, would you persist? I wouldn't. And I would also apologise for causing any unintentional offence. It's not just the phrase he used, it was the intent and the fact that he persisted. It must be some form of OCD he has.
 
[quote author=foureyes link=topic=24077.msg587362#msg587362 date=1212524594]
[quote author=Hardcastle link=topic=24077.msg587281#msg587281 date=1212520715]
To be fair Foureyes mate, I think you've overreacted a fair bit there.

Roger being a fucktard is a given, even so I don't think what he said is that bad.
[/quote]

His comment was meant as an insult with racial undertones. I didn't get too pissed off by it initially as you can see by my first response to him HC. But the dumb fuk kept on pushing after I had asked him not to. That's what really wound me up. If you made a wise crack in jest at a new poster on the site and they politely mentioned the fact that they took offence and explained why, would you persist? I wouldn't. And I would also apologise for causing any unintentional offence. It's not just the phrase he used, it was the intent and the fact that he persisted. It must be some form of OCD he has.
[/quote]

In fairness, only he knows his intent. Your interpreting his intent and I can see why. This whole episode shows why you shouldn't judge people by your own standards, because rarely will they live up to them.

*retreats realising that he has kinda stuck up for Rog*
 
[quote author=Rosco link=topic=24077.msg587361#msg587361 date=1212524580]
[quote author=Whaddapie link=topic=24077.msg587357#msg587357 date=1212524420]
As do I, but 4I's point is that as soon as it became apparant that he was offended by the comment, roger's refusal to apologise and his decision to continue with that line of 'humour' then made the comments racist becasue he was aware that the 'offendee' considered them such...

... your honour.
[/quote]

heh ... you just reminded me that I'm kinda sticking up for Rog here, and while I think he was an idiot here I still don't think the comment was (or can be considering he is asian himself) racist
[/quote]

I find somebody insulting me and referring to throwing onion bhajees racially offensive. The fact that he fucking persisted shows there was malice behind it. That's what fuks me off. I'll have a laugh and joke about my skin colour with the next man quite happily. But not when there's that sort of intent. Is Roger Indian/Pakistani? I doubt it. He refers to himself as Asian. That's a big part of the world. In the states, Asian means a different part of the world to India/Pakistan.
 
[quote author=Spionkop69 link=topic=24077.msg587364#msg587364 date=1212524799]
[quote author=foureyes link=topic=24077.msg587362#msg587362 date=1212524594]
[quote author=Hardcastle link=topic=24077.msg587281#msg587281 date=1212520715]
To be fair Foureyes mate, I think you've overreacted a fair bit there.

Roger being a fucktard is a given, even so I don't think what he said is that bad.
[/quote]

His comment was meant as an insult with racial undertones. I didn't get too pissed off by it initially as you can see by my first response to him HC. But the dumb fuk kept on pushing after I had asked him not to. That's what really wound me up. If you made a wise crack in jest at a new poster on the site and they politely mentioned the fact that they took offence and explained why, would you persist? I wouldn't. And I would also apologise for causing any unintentional offence. It's not just the phrase he used, it was the intent and the fact that he persisted. It must be some form of OCD he has.
[/quote]

In fairness, only he knows his intent. Your interpreting his intent and I can see why. This whole episode shows why you shouldn't judge people by your own standards, because rarely will they live up to them.

*retreats realising that he has kinda stuck up for Rog*
[/quote]

Nah. If you read his long winded post you can see what his intent was. It's pretty clear mate.
 
[quote author=foureyes link=topic=24077.msg587369#msg587369 date=1212525017]
[quote author=Spionkop69 link=topic=24077.msg587364#msg587364 date=1212524799]
[quote author=foureyes link=topic=24077.msg587362#msg587362 date=1212524594]
[quote author=Hardcastle link=topic=24077.msg587281#msg587281 date=1212520715]
To be fair Foureyes mate, I think you've overreacted a fair bit there.

Roger being a fucktard is a given, even so I don't think what he said is that bad.
[/quote]

His comment was meant as an insult with racial undertones. I didn't get too pissed off by it initially as you can see by my first response to him HC. But the dumb fuk kept on pushing after I had asked him not to. That's what really wound me up. If you made a wise crack in jest at a new poster on the site and they politely mentioned the fact that they took offence and explained why, would you persist? I wouldn't. And I would also apologise for causing any unintentional offence. It's not just the phrase he used, it was the intent and the fact that he persisted. It must be some form of OCD he has.
[/quote]

In fairness, only he knows his intent. Your interpreting his intent and I can see why. This whole episode shows why you shouldn't judge people by your own standards, because rarely will they live up to them.

*retreats realising that he has kinda stuck up for Rog*
[/quote]

Nah. If you read his long winded post you can see what his intent was. It's pretty clear mate.
[/quote]

*goes back to read it*

Hmmm, I can see why you're offended as it seemed aimed at you personally. Stereotyped? Probably. Racist? Well I can see why people find it offensive, but I personally would have to be feeling very sensitive to find that racist (sorry Foureyes, this doesn't of course mean you're wrong).

Hell what do I know as a white man I can't be racially abused!
 
[quote author=foureyes link=topic=24077.msg587367#msg587367 date=1212524938]
[quote author=Rosco link=topic=24077.msg587361#msg587361 date=1212524580]
[quote author=Whaddapie link=topic=24077.msg587357#msg587357 date=1212524420]
As do I, but 4I's point is that as soon as it became apparant that he was offended by the comment, roger's refusal to apologise and his decision to continue with that line of 'humour' then made the comments racist becasue he was aware that the 'offendee' considered them such...

... your honour.
[/quote]

heh ... you just reminded me that I'm kinda sticking up for Rog here, and while I think he was an idiot here I still don't think the comment was (or can be considering he is asian himself) racist
[/quote]

I find somebody insulting me and referring to throwing onion bhajees racially offensive. The fact that he fucking persisted shows there was malice behind it. That's what fuks me off. I'll have a laugh and joke about my skin colour with the next man quite happily. But not when there's that sort of intent. Is Roger Indian/Pakistani? I doubt it. He refers to himself as Asian. That's a big part of the world. In the states, Asian means a different part of the world to India/Pakistan.
[/quote]

I still don't get it.

I might be thick but I was under the impression that racism was discrimination on the basis of racial group.
 
[quote author=Rosco link=topic=24077.msg587374#msg587374 date=1212525169]
[quote author=foureyes link=topic=24077.msg587367#msg587367 date=1212524938]
[quote author=Rosco link=topic=24077.msg587361#msg587361 date=1212524580]
[quote author=Whaddapie link=topic=24077.msg587357#msg587357 date=1212524420]
As do I, but 4I's point is that as soon as it became apparant that he was offended by the comment, roger's refusal to apologise and his decision to continue with that line of 'humour' then made the comments racist becasue he was aware that the 'offendee' considered them such...

... your honour.
[/quote]

heh ... you just reminded me that I'm kinda sticking up for Rog here, and while I think he was an idiot here I still don't think the comment was (or can be considering he is asian himself) racist
[/quote]

I find somebody insulting me and referring to throwing onion bhajees racially offensive. The fact that he fucking persisted shows there was malice behind it. That's what fuks me off. I'll have a laugh and joke about my skin colour with the next man quite happily. But not when there's that sort of intent. Is Roger Indian/Pakistani? I doubt it. He refers to himself as Asian. That's a big part of the world. In the states, Asian means a different part of the world to India/Pakistan.
[/quote]

I still don't get it.

I might be thick but I was under the impression that racism was discrimination on the basis of racial group.
[/quote]

I don't get why you don't. Come on, he's taking the piss out of my background by referring to onion bhajees. I've been called curry muncher, chappati head blah blah in the past. They're all dumb insults referring to my background, my colour and ethnicity.
 
[quote author=Spionkop69 link=topic=24077.msg587371#msg587371 date=1212525077]
[quote author=foureyes link=topic=24077.msg587369#msg587369 date=1212525017]
[quote author=Spionkop69 link=topic=24077.msg587364#msg587364 date=1212524799]
[quote author=foureyes link=topic=24077.msg587362#msg587362 date=1212524594]
[quote author=Hardcastle link=topic=24077.msg587281#msg587281 date=1212520715]
To be fair Foureyes mate, I think you've overreacted a fair bit there.

Roger being a fucktard is a given, even so I don't think what he said is that bad.
[/quote]

His comment was meant as an insult with racial undertones. I didn't get too pissed off by it initially as you can see by my first response to him HC. But the dumb fuk kept on pushing after I had asked him not to. That's what really wound me up. If you made a wise crack in jest at a new poster on the site and they politely mentioned the fact that they took offence and explained why, would you persist? I wouldn't. And I would also apologise for causing any unintentional offence. It's not just the phrase he used, it was the intent and the fact that he persisted. It must be some form of OCD he has.
[/quote]

In fairness, only he knows his intent. Your interpreting his intent and I can see why. This whole episode shows why you shouldn't judge people by your own standards, because rarely will they live up to them.

*retreats realising that he has kinda stuck up for Rog*
[/quote]

Nah. If you read his long winded post you can see what his intent was. It's pretty clear mate.
[/quote]

*goes back to read it*

Hmmm, I can see why you're offended as it seemed aimed at you personally. Stereotyped? Probably. Racist? Well I can see why people find it offensive, but I personally would have to be feeling very sensitive to find that racist (sorry Foureyes, this doesn't of course mean you're wrong).

Hell what do I know as a white man I can't be racially abused!
[/quote]

There's a thin blurry line between stereotype and racist remarks. I'm not saying i'm suffering racial discrimination at the hands of Rog, he's an equally large fukwit with everyone, but he's taking the piss out of my race.

I know it's not even on the same level, but why do people jump up in arms when black football players get racially abused with monkey chants? I don't like people implying i'm an onion bhajee muncher.
 
This thread is great.

It's starts of with foureyes being completely intolerant of one group of people and ends up with him getting ridiculously over the top angry when Roger, of all people, is supposedly being intolerant of his own 'group' of people.
 
[quote author=keniget link=topic=24077.msg587425#msg587425 date=1212528564]
This thread is great.

It's starts of with foureyes being completely intolerant of one group of people and ends up with him getting ridiculously over the top angry when Roger, of all people, is supposedly being intolerant of his own 'group' of people.
[/quote]

That's rubbish. I'm not intolerant of swingers. I just find what they choose to do is twisted. Roger is taking the piss out of who I am and where I come from. Two things I have no control over. Do you not see the difference?
 
You were being rather judgemental in fairness - they can't possibly love each other, it's wrong, immoral etc.

It doesn't matter whether it's a choice or not. Should they have to change who they are and how they've chosen to live their life in order to escape people looking down on them and making judgements?

I don't really think it's different at all. Intolerance is intolerance.
 
[quote author=keniget link=topic=24077.msg587433#msg587433 date=1212529594]
You were being rather judgemental in fairness - they can't possibly love each other, it's wrong, immoral etc.

It doesn't matter whether it's a choice or not. Should they have to change who they are and how they've chosen to live their life in order to escape people looking down on them and making judgements?

I don't really think it's different at all. Intolerance is intolerance.
[/quote]

If I had a friend who was a swinger I wouldn't treat him any differently. I would not be intolerant of him. Not at all.

Yes I was judgemental, purely because I find the whole thing twisted. But you still don't see the difference.

I am brown. So i get the piss taken? Purely because of the colour of my skin? Nothing to do with the my decisions in life, my beliefs or my actions towards others. Just because I'm brown. The difference is obvious.
 
[quote author=foureyes link=topic=24077.msg587403#msg587403 date=1212526428]

I'm not saying i'm suffering racial discrimination at the hands of Rog
[/quote]



[quote author=foureyes link=topic=24077.msg587436#msg587436 date=1212530117]

I am brown. So i get the piss taken? Purely because of the colour of my skin? Nothing to do with the my decisions in life, my beliefs or my actions towards others. Just because I'm brown. The difference is obvious.
[/quote]


So which is it ?

Are you suffering racial discrimination or not ?
 
[quote author=foureyes link=topic=24077.msg587362#msg587362 date=1212524594]
[quote author=Hardcastle link=topic=24077.msg587281#msg587281 date=1212520715]
To be fair Foureyes mate, I think you've overreacted a fair bit there.

Roger being a fucktard is a given, even so I don't think what he said is that bad.
[/quote]

His comment was meant as an insult with racial undertones. I didn't get too pissed off by it initially as you can see by my first response to him HC. But the dumb fuk kept on pushing after I had asked him not to. That's what really wound me up. If you made a wise crack in jest at a new poster on the site and they politely mentioned the fact that they took offence and explained why, would you persist? I wouldn't. And I would also apologise for causing any unintentional offence. It's not just the phrase he used, it was the intent and the fact that he persisted. It must be some form of OCD he has.
[/quote]

Fair shout.
 
[quote author=foureyes link=topic=24077.msg587436#msg587436 date=1212530117]
If I had a friend who was a swinger I wouldn't treat him any differently. I would not be intolerant of him. Not at all.

Yes I was judgemental, purely because I find the whole thing twisted. But you still don't see the difference.

I am brown. So i get the piss taken? Purely because of the colour of my skin? Nothing to do with the my decisions in life, my beliefs or my actions towards others. Just because I'm brown. The difference is obvious.
[/quote]

So you'll only be tolerant if it's your friend? Heh... or you think it's fine to be judgemental on here, but you wouldn't be in real life?

Well Roger already said that in real life, he wouldn't treat you any different either, so what's the problem?

He's a bit of an idiot on here and it was blatantly obvious that he was just being his usual "hey, I'm trying real hard" self, so why did it bother you so much? It's the Internet man..... chill out.
 
[quote author=Rosco link=topic=24077.msg587442#msg587442 date=1212530711]
[quote author=foureyes link=topic=24077.msg587403#msg587403 date=1212526428]

I'm not saying i'm suffering racial discrimination at the hands of Rog
[/quote]



[quote author=foureyes link=topic=24077.msg587436#msg587436 date=1212530117]

I am brown. So i get the piss taken? Purely because of the colour of my skin? Nothing to do with the my decisions in life, my beliefs or my actions towards others. Just because I'm brown. The difference is obvious.
[/quote]


So which is it ?

Are you suffering racial discrimination or not ?
[/quote]

Probably my bad choice of vocab. It depends what you mean by racial discrimination. I assume most people would associate the term with being excluded or held back (for example at work) due to the colour of their skin. Obviously that's not the case with Rog. But he's implying I am a certain type of person due to my race. A onion bhajee muncher.
 
I think you lot are giving Foureyes a pretty hard time considering he's done nothing wrong; I don't think he's playing the 'racial intolerant' card or whatever either.
 
[quote author=keniget link=topic=24077.msg587446#msg587446 date=1212531241]
[quote author=foureyes link=topic=24077.msg587436#msg587436 date=1212530117]
If I had a friend who was a swinger I wouldn't treat him any differently. I would not be intolerant of him. Not at all.

Yes I was judgemental, purely because I find the whole thing twisted. But you still don't see the difference.

I am brown. So i get the piss taken? Purely because of the colour of my skin? Nothing to do with the my decisions in life, my beliefs or my actions towards others. Just because I'm brown. The difference is obvious.
[/quote]

So you'll only be tolerant if it's your friend? Heh... or you think it's fine to be judgemental on here, but you wouldn't be in real life?

Well Roger already said that in real life, he wouldn't treat you any different either, so what's the problem?

He's a bit of an idiot on here and it was blatantly obvious that he was just being his usual "hey, I'm trying real hard" self, so why did it bother you so much? It's the Internet man..... chill out.

[/quote]

You're wrong. Sorry but Rog has been abusive towards me on many occasions and I have happily retaliated and pretty much ignored the twat. But this was meant with malice as an insult, which is why even after I politely asked him to refrain, he continued.

It would make no difference if it were a friend or a man in a pub. I just gave an example. It would make no difference in real life. If somebody asked my opinion I would give it.
 
[quote author=Rosco link=topic=24077.msg587452#msg587452 date=1212531461]
Well I think you're being every bit as stupid as Rog then Foureyes.
[/quote]

Fuk me, that's a bit harsh. Care to elaborate?
 
[quote author=Hardcastle link=topic=24077.msg587451#msg587451 date=1212531428]
I think you lot are giving Foureyes a pretty hard time considering he's done nothing wrong; I don't think he's playing the 'racial intolerant' card or whatever either.
[/quote]

Thanks HC. I guess I kinda have my hands full with this lot tonight...
 
Here's how I see it...

We're treading dangerous ground when the racial abuse or lack thereof committed by a person is determined soley by whether or not the target of the comment is offended by it.

Friends tease you over your skin colour... That's ok. They're friends.

Roger teases you over a cultural stereotype (which I would think would be far less potentially hurtful than the skin colour jibes)... That's not ok. He's not a friend.

Logic suggests that had a friend of yours said exactly the same thing to you today that roger did, you wouldn't have been offended, because you know them.

I do understand why you were offended. I really do. If you (anybody) don't find something funny, you just don't. And certain people have earned certain priviliges with you that roger clearly never will. All completely normal.

But if the mood of the 'victim' determines whether the 'offender' is racist or not, isn't that just giving us carte blanche to be offended by anybody for anything at anytime, without really having a grounds for that offense?

I think that roger was a prick to you this afternoon. But, though he is undoubtedly as sensitive as a drunken skinhead, I just don't see any racist in there.

Not many brains either, mind...
 
[quote author=foureyes link=topic=24077.msg587456#msg587456 date=1212531857]
[quote author=Rosco link=topic=24077.msg587452#msg587452 date=1212531461]
Well I think you're being every bit as stupid as Rog then Foureyes.
[/quote]

Fuk me, that's a bit harsh. Care to elaborate?
[/quote]

I was about to elaborate but I just read Whaddapie's post first, and he has eloquently put forward pretty much what I was thinking.
 
[quote author=Whaddapie link=topic=24077.msg587461#msg587461 date=1212532034]
Here's how I see it...

We're treading dangerous ground when the racial abuse or lack thereof committed by a person is determined soley by whether or not the target of the comment is offended by it.

Friends tease you over your skin colour... That's ok. They're friends.

Roger teases you over a cultural stereotype (which I would think would be far less potentially hurtful than the skin colour jibes)... That's not ok. He's not a friend.

Logic suggests that had a friend of yours said exactly the same thing to you today that roger did, you wouldn't have been offended, because you know them.

I do understand why you were offended. I really do. If you (anybody) don't find something funny, you just don't. And certain people have earned certain priviliges with you that roger clearly never will. All completely normal.

But if the mood of the 'victim' determines whether the 'offender' is racist or not, isn't that just giving us carte blanche to be offended by anybody for anything at anytime, without really having a grounds for that offense?

I think that roger was a prick to you this afternoon. But, though he is undoubtedly as sensitive as a drunken skinhead, I just don't see any racist in there.

Not many brains either, mind...
[/quote]

But it's not just black and white with friend or not friend. It's about intent behind the statement.

In my eyes, the original statement is in no way racist or degrading or whatever; but in the context and whatever and how Roger meant it, or atleast appeared to ;I can see how it comes across as quite sworded and boarder line offensive.

Probably best if this whole episode is forgotten,eh?
 
Back
Top Bottom