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A Rant From a QPR Fan...

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Mistadobalina

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I had this E-mailed to me today. Quite a funny look at modern football, from a QPR fans perspective...


I take more pleasure in seeing Chelsea lose than I do in seeing QPR win at the moment.

I sat through so many matches when we were absolute dogs**t under the likes of Ray Harford and with people like Paul Bruce, Matthew Brazier and Mark Perry in the squad and I never felt like this.

The club isn't ours anymore but more so than that - football is just properly gash these days.

I mean really gash.

football generally.

I hate nearly everything about it these days....

I hate the Prem and the myth that it is exciting this year. ManCity breaking into the top four isn't exciting. They spent loads of money. It's no more exciting that Nameless C*** getting to number 1 in the charts after winning the X-Factor.

I hate the myth of Arsene's kids. Buying some French kid when he's 17, playing him in the League Cup and then selling him when he's 20 after about 3 appearances in the league is NOTHING SPECIAL.

I hate hearing about Liverpool/Man Utd's debt but nothing ever happening about it. A club needs to go to the wall for the money thing to change but it doesn't happen. Why the **** are Charlton, Leeds and Southampton still in business?

I hate Frank Lampard's stupid f'ing face.

I hate John Terry being England captain when he's CLEARLY AN OAF.

I hate the England team.

I hate young exciting wingers who have nothing but pace. Tony Scully had nothing but pace.

I hate the FA Cup. There may be little shocks like last night but for the most part you know who's going to win it. Unless a team throws away all their financial security to win it a la Pompey.

I hate Harry f'ing Redknapp. And Jamie Redknapp. And Louise Redknapp. And the Wii.

I hate James Nesbitt, Eammon Holmes and f***ing everyone.

I hate Gary Lineker and Alan Shearer.

I hate Garth Crooks.

I hate Garth Brooks for that matter.

I hate Sky Sports.

I hate that when a lower league player beats 10 players and chips the keeper it doesn't matter but if Rooney scores from more than 20 yards it's amazing.

I hate that everything football related has to have 'Club Foot' playing behind it.

I hate that female sports journos are now mandatory.

I hate Mark Lawrensen for not coming out. 'I do like a big man at the back'. I bet you do.

I hate any advert that portrays football to be about anything other than pain and disappointment.

I hate any advert that mentions pies at football.

I hate Lee Hughes and the fact that he makes a living from the game. I hate Marlon King and any team that signs him when he gets out. I hate that it'll probably be us.

I hate Phil Brown.

I hate 'well the ball is a lot lighter now and will cause goalkeepers real problems this summer' before EVERY F'ING TOURNAMENT.

I hate that Kieron Dyer earned more in the time I took to write this post than I'll earn this month.

I hate Adrian Durham, Ian Wright and Alan Brazil.

I hate Gazza. Either die or shut up. Stop f'ing lingering.

I hate that a comeback from 4-0 down at half time (TWICE) means nothing because we aren't f'ing scouse.

I hate Leeds.

I hate Roy Keane.

I hate grown men wearing football shirts of their team whilst shopping on a saturday when their team is playing at home.

I hate that I don't hate Roy Hodgson.

I hate Jermaine Beckford and any player who has neck tattoos.

I hate songs being inappropriately taken as club anthems and then sung in a manly way. 'I'm forever blowing bubbles....'. Gaylords.

I hate Danny Dyer and anyone he's ever interviewed.

I hate the book 'Cass' by Cass Pennant. It is honestly the stupidest thing I've ever read. Chapter 1: Millwall. 'Yeah we took 50 to Millwall. They had 1000 in their mob but we ran 'em up and down the street'. Chapter 2: Liverpool. 'Yeah we took 50 to Liverpool. They had 2000 in their mob but we ran 'em up and down the street'. Fk me... Jade Goody's autobiography is probably better. Even her non-ghost written one.

I hate that all good youngsters end their careers at Spurs before they start.
 
[quote author=Ryan link=topic=38576.msg1040696#msg1040696 date=1264129186]
It's like a shit version of Brendan to be honest.
[/quote]

Bit harsh... Some of that is quite funny.
 
Actually I don't have anyone on ignore but I've skipped the aforementioned poster's posts for ages now and enjoy the forum more as a result.

Have I missed anything exciting and new or is Lucas still a ***t?
 
[quote author=Wilko7 link=topic=38576.msg1040707#msg1040707 date=1264130687]
Actually I don't have anyone on ignore but I've skipped the aforementioned poster's posts for ages now and enjoy the forum more as a result.

Have I missed anything exciting and new or is Lucas still a ***t?
[/quote]

Missed anything?!?!

Brendan's house was burning down while he, Rollergirl and the kids were sleeping. Lucas just happened to be walking past as the fire broke out and without thought for his own safety, he ran in, and single handedly saved all the family from a horrible death, carrying them, one by one from the burning building. When Brendan gathered himself in the garden outside, he looked around at his shaken up but safe family, turned to the exhausted and badly burnt Lucas and said to him... "Where's the f@#$ing goldfish, you useless cnut?".
 
[quote author=Whaddapie link=topic=38576.msg1040706#msg1040706 date=1264130599]
[quote author=Ryan link=topic=38576.msg1040696#msg1040696 date=1264129186]
It's like a shit version of Brendan to be honest.
[/quote]

Bit harsh... Some of that is quite funny.
[/quote]

It's a like good Dr Cox rant, which makes it very funny
 
[quote author=Wilko7 link=topic=38576.msg1040707#msg1040707 date=1264130687]
Actually I don't have anyone on ignore but I've skipped the aforementioned poster's posts for ages now and enjoy the forum more as a result.

Have I missed anything exciting and new or is Lucas still a ***t?
[/quote]

I'd guess that you have made "missing anything exciting" the habit of a fucking lifetime, you beige twat.
 
[quote author=Whaddapie link=topic=38576.msg1040710#msg1040710 date=1264131236]
[quote author=Wilko7 link=topic=38576.msg1040707#msg1040707 date=1264130687]
Actually I don't have anyone on ignore but I've skipped the aforementioned poster's posts for ages now and enjoy the forum more as a result.

Have I missed anything exciting and new or is Lucas still a ***t?
[/quote]

Missed anything?!?!

Brendan's house was burning down while he, Rollergirl and the kids were sleeping. Lucas just happened to be walking past as the fire broke out and without thought for his own safety, he ran in, and single handedly saved all the family from a horrible death, carrying them, one by one from the burning building. When Brendan gathered himself in the garden outside, he looked around at his shaken up but safe family, turned to the exhausted and badly burnt Lucas and said to him... "Where's the f@#$ing goldfish, you useless cnut?".
[/quote]

Haha.
 
[quote author=Whaddapie link=topic=38576.msg1040710#msg1040710 date=1264131236]
[quote author=Wilko7 link=topic=38576.msg1040707#msg1040707 date=1264130687]
Actually I don't have anyone on ignore but I've skipped the aforementioned poster's posts for ages now and enjoy the forum more as a result.

Have I missed anything exciting and new or is Lucas still a ***t?
[/quote]

Missed anything?!?!

Brendan's house was burning down while he, Rollergirl and the kids were sleeping. Lucas just happened to be walking past as the fire broke out and without thought for his own safety, he ran in, and single handedly saved all the family from a horrible death, carrying them, one by one from the burning building. When Brendan gathered himself in the garden outside, he looked around at his shaken up but safe family, turned to the exhausted and badly burnt Lucas and said to him... "Where's the f@#$ing goldfish, you useless cnut?".
[/quote]

haha
 
[quote author=Whaddapie link=topic=38576.msg1040710#msg1040710 date=1264131236]
[quote author=Wilko7 link=topic=38576.msg1040707#msg1040707 date=1264130687]
Actually I don't have anyone on ignore but I've skipped the aforementioned poster's posts for ages now and enjoy the forum more as a result.

Have I missed anything exciting and new or is Lucas still a ***t?
[/quote]

Missed anything?!?!

Brendan's house was burning down while he, Rollergirl and the kids were sleeping. Lucas just happened to be walking past as the fire broke out and without thought for his own safety, he ran in, and single handedly saved all the family from a horrible death, carrying them, one by one from the burning building. When Brendan gathered himself in the garden outside, he looked around at his shaken up but safe family, turned to the exhausted and badly burnt Lucas and said to him... "Where's the f@#$ing goldfish, you useless cnut?".
[/quote]

you plagerist..! ;-)
 
Lawrensen certainly comes across as rather limp wristed however does he actually bat for the other side?
 
Lawrenson has certainly been married before and may be married now so if he is a gayer he's hiding the fact.

You can't really argue much with the original post in term of its targets.
 
[quote author=Ryan link=topic=38576.msg1040696#msg1040696 date=1264129186]
It's like a shit version of Brendan to be honest.
[/quote]

lol good stuff Ryan
 
[quote author=Mistadobalina link=topic=38576.msg1040674#msg1040674 date=1264123399]

I hate the Prem and the myth that it is exciting this year. ManCity breaking into the top four isn't exciting. They spent loads of money. It's no more exciting that Nameless C*** getting to number 1 in the charts after winning the X-Factor.

[/quote]

Rage Against The Machine were number 1!
 
He cares too much about things which are nothing to do with his club.

Sure I hate John Terry, the England team, blah, blah, blah. But I'd never let any of that extra shit taint my love of Liverpool football club.
 
[quote author=Mystic link=topic=38576.msg1041697#msg1041697 date=1264255931]
[quote author=Mistadobalina link=topic=38576.msg1040674#msg1040674 date=1264123399]

I hate the Prem and the myth that it is exciting this year. ManCity breaking into the top four isn't exciting. They spent loads of money. It's no more exciting that Nameless C*** getting to number 1 in the charts after winning the X-Factor.

[/quote]

Rage Against The Machine were number 1!
[/quote]

Fuck nuts big teeth made it to No. 1 the following week.

Great email though
 
[quote author=Mistadobalina link=topic=38576.msg1040674#msg1040674 date=1264123399]
I hate John Terry being England captain when he's CLEARLY AN OAF.

I hate Harry f'ing Redknapp. And Jamie Redknapp. And Louise Redknapp. And the Wii.

I hate that female sports journos are now mandatory.

I hate grown men wearing football shirts of their team whilst shopping on a saturday when their team is playing at home.

I hate songs being inappropriately taken as club anthems and then sung in a manly way. 'I'm forever blowing bubbles....'. Gaylords.
[/quote]
Funny.
 
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