Unlucky mate.
RIP.
RIP.
The departed
- Thread starter Dreambeliever
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Thoughts are with you Pat.
Just found my dads grave. I've paid my respects and can put a bit of closure on it now.
RIP.
RIP.
My Grandma passed away last week. Although it is a very sad time I went up to see her last weekend on the saturday and said my goodbyes. She died last Monday morning. I dont really know how to describe it, maybe a peace of mind feeling, that I had a chance to say goodbye knowing that she was nearing the end, something I didnt get a chance to do with my Dad.
RIP Grandma
RIP Grandma
Nosey bastard.
Thoughts are with you Pat ole chap ...
This year, 3 family members passed away.
My mom's aunt passed away of cancer in Feb. She had essentially replaced her sister, my gran, as my granny since '96 when my Gran passed away from cancer. I had been very very close to her and as she started to die of cancer, I spent more time with her and allowed her to bond with my son. She had 4 kids, one passed away at 8 from leukemia, and never had grandchildren. So this was 'her first' in essence. Her funeral was the first funeral I had ever been to of someone I knew and loved.
My dad's aunt passed away weeks after my mom's aunt. She was a phenomenal lady, died at 93 years old. Before she died, she still spoke Italian, French, Hebrew and Ladino fluently. She learned all on Rhodes, where my dad's family was from originally. I was also very close to her - she had taken my grandfather from Rhodes a few days before the Nazis arrived and send most of the Island's Jews to Auschwitz. Without her, my family name would have ceased in 1943/44 most likely. My saw her a few days before she died in hospital. She remembered me straight away, but I could tell by her breathing she'd die soon. She said what she always said to me, "Health and Happiness, that's all I wish for you" ... I'm glad she got to spend time with me (named after her dad) and my son (named after her brother, my grandfather) together ...
My mom's uncle passed away two months ago in New Zealand. I didn't know him very well - the last time I had seen him was '93 - but I cared for him a lot. His last 'gift' to his family was to take his wife out of Zimbabwe. He was a good man ...
Been a tough year ... But I'm sure they're in a better place now.
This year, 3 family members passed away.
My mom's aunt passed away of cancer in Feb. She had essentially replaced her sister, my gran, as my granny since '96 when my Gran passed away from cancer. I had been very very close to her and as she started to die of cancer, I spent more time with her and allowed her to bond with my son. She had 4 kids, one passed away at 8 from leukemia, and never had grandchildren. So this was 'her first' in essence. Her funeral was the first funeral I had ever been to of someone I knew and loved.
My dad's aunt passed away weeks after my mom's aunt. She was a phenomenal lady, died at 93 years old. Before she died, she still spoke Italian, French, Hebrew and Ladino fluently. She learned all on Rhodes, where my dad's family was from originally. I was also very close to her - she had taken my grandfather from Rhodes a few days before the Nazis arrived and send most of the Island's Jews to Auschwitz. Without her, my family name would have ceased in 1943/44 most likely. My saw her a few days before she died in hospital. She remembered me straight away, but I could tell by her breathing she'd die soon. She said what she always said to me, "Health and Happiness, that's all I wish for you" ... I'm glad she got to spend time with me (named after her dad) and my son (named after her brother, my grandfather) together ...
My mom's uncle passed away two months ago in New Zealand. I didn't know him very well - the last time I had seen him was '93 - but I cared for him a lot. His last 'gift' to his family was to take his wife out of Zimbabwe. He was a good man ...
Been a tough year ... But I'm sure they're in a better place now.
[quote author=Rosco link=topic=23384.msg960140#msg960140 date=1255043170]
[quote author=Red_Till_I_Die link=topic=23384.msg959833#msg959833 date=1255005074]
Just found my dads grave. I've paid my respects and can put a bit of closure on it now.
RIP.
[/quote]
You just found it ?
Sounds like there's a story there
[/quote]
It's not much of a story - I hadn’t spoke to my Dad since I was 16, I decided to send him a letter letting him know how I was getting on, how I was engaged and it would be nice if he could come to my wedding. I then received a letter from his girlfriend saying he had died 2 years ago at the age of 47.
I replied asking where he was buried and heard nothing. So started rummaging through the Liverpool Echo, contacting the Births, Deaths and Marriages department, managed to get a date of death, but no place of burial. Due to the common name, ended up driving to West Derby cemetery only to find nothing.
Then a really nice lady from the Central Library Record Office found a back copy of the Liverpool Echo, to find he was buried in Anfield Cemetery and very kindly found me a grave reference. Drove over, found his after thought of a grave, paid my respects, drove round to his old house and find out why I didn’t get a reply, but no one was in. Still pissed that they didn't even think to find me when he died, as I was only flesh and blood.
[quote author=Red_Till_I_Die link=topic=23384.msg959833#msg959833 date=1255005074]
Just found my dads grave. I've paid my respects and can put a bit of closure on it now.
RIP.
[/quote]
You just found it ?
Sounds like there's a story there
[/quote]
It's not much of a story - I hadn’t spoke to my Dad since I was 16, I decided to send him a letter letting him know how I was getting on, how I was engaged and it would be nice if he could come to my wedding. I then received a letter from his girlfriend saying he had died 2 years ago at the age of 47.
I replied asking where he was buried and heard nothing. So started rummaging through the Liverpool Echo, contacting the Births, Deaths and Marriages department, managed to get a date of death, but no place of burial. Due to the common name, ended up driving to West Derby cemetery only to find nothing.
Then a really nice lady from the Central Library Record Office found a back copy of the Liverpool Echo, to find he was buried in Anfield Cemetery and very kindly found me a grave reference. Drove over, found his after thought of a grave, paid my respects, drove round to his old house and find out why I didn’t get a reply, but no one was in. Still pissed that they didn't even think to find me when he died, as I was only flesh and blood.
[quote author=mark1975 link=topic=23384.msg962169#msg962169 date=1255504689]
[quote author=Dreambeliever link=topic=23384.msg957748#msg957748 date=1254725469]
Grandfather just died.
Not nice being away from family at times like this.
RIP.
[/quote]
Bad news that Pat, Bristow, RTID and LTW my sincere condolences mateys 🙁
YNWA
[/quote]
Thats a really tought year LTW, I don't think my loss can compare.
My thoughts are with you all.
And thanks for the well wishes from everyone especially those who may think I'm a cnut/idiot most of the time.
It means alot.
[quote author=Dreambeliever link=topic=23384.msg957748#msg957748 date=1254725469]
Grandfather just died.
Not nice being away from family at times like this.
RIP.
[/quote]
Bad news that Pat, Bristow, RTID and LTW my sincere condolences mateys 🙁
YNWA
[/quote]
Thats a really tought year LTW, I don't think my loss can compare.
My thoughts are with you all.
And thanks for the well wishes from everyone especially those who may think I'm a cnut/idiot most of the time.
It means alot.
[quote author=Dreambeliever link=topic=23384.msg963545#msg963545 date=1255661111]
I don't think my loss can compare.[/quote]
It's not about comparing ole chap, it's all relative ... We all share it because it IS a loss for us and we struggle with it in one way, or another. May we all just hear good news ...
I don't think my loss can compare.[/quote]
It's not about comparing ole chap, it's all relative ... We all share it because it IS a loss for us and we struggle with it in one way, or another. May we all just hear good news ...
I have reread this thread recently, having totally forgotten about it and naturally (for me) it made me think of my Dad, who died just short of three years ago. At the time I was well reconciled to his passing having witnessed him become bedridden over the months preceding his death and witnessing his quality of life dissappear. For a man who loved doing "stuff" it was the last thing he would have wanted. As perverse as it may sound, there was a certain relief that came with his passing which took the edge of his death.
In the interim I have thought about him often and as much as I would like to have him around I don't begrudge him his moving on.
Dad I love you and I wished I had told you that more often.
Also I would like to say something to Dreambeliever, the initiator and significant contributer to this thread.
Mate, in responce to what you said in an earlier post,, I really doubt if there are any posters on here that truly believe that you are a cunt or an idiot. If they do, then that is a reflection on them rather than you I believe.
You kop enough unwarranted shit already without piling it upon yourself.
Keep the faith a chara!
In the interim I have thought about him often and as much as I would like to have him around I don't begrudge him his moving on.
Dad I love you and I wished I had told you that more often.
Also I would like to say something to Dreambeliever, the initiator and significant contributer to this thread.
Mate, in responce to what you said in an earlier post,, I really doubt if there are any posters on here that truly believe that you are a cunt or an idiot. If they do, then that is a reflection on them rather than you I believe.
You kop enough unwarranted shit already without piling it upon yourself.
Keep the faith a chara!
Nice post The Count.
My Mother in Law died about 6 weeks ago and it is still hard for the wife to take.
Despite the distances involved we are all close to my Mum as well and I just can't begin to think how it must feel not being able to pick the phone up and chat to your Mum, as I do most days.
She and my Stepdad were phenominal when I was in hospital and a very close bond grew between her and my eldest as she spent most of one summer looking after him during the day whilst my stepdad drove the wife to hospital to visit me.
Anyway, fortunately my mother is in good health for her age, but my Ma in Law succumbed to Multiple Myeloma after a 9 year battle. RIP.
Despite the distances involved we are all close to my Mum as well and I just can't begin to think how it must feel not being able to pick the phone up and chat to your Mum, as I do most days.
She and my Stepdad were phenominal when I was in hospital and a very close bond grew between her and my eldest as she spent most of one summer looking after him during the day whilst my stepdad drove the wife to hospital to visit me.
Anyway, fortunately my mother is in good health for her age, but my Ma in Law succumbed to Multiple Myeloma after a 9 year battle. RIP.
I hope I didnt sound like one of those idiots who seem to think that its OK to lose people, as long as they're old.
Wasnt my intention.
It's terrible when you lose them at any age.
Just seems to hurt more when theyre young.
I lost my mother at 58; it's still hard to think about it sometimes.
My comdolences, Crazy Horse.
Wasnt my intention.
It's terrible when you lose them at any age.
Just seems to hurt more when theyre young.
I lost my mother at 58; it's still hard to think about it sometimes.
My comdolences, Crazy Horse.
[quote author=Avmenon link=topic=23384.msg1057248#msg1057248 date=1266748624]
I hope I didnt sound like one of those idiots who seem to think that its OK to lose people, as long as they're old.
Wasnt my intention.
It's terrible when you lose them at any age.
Just seems to hurt more when theyre young.
I lost my mother at 58; it's still hard to think about it sometimes.
My comdolences, Crazy Horse.
[/quote]
That makes sense avy and is very true. Dad was 54. You just never expect to lose a parent young so is always a massive shock when you do.
I hope I didnt sound like one of those idiots who seem to think that its OK to lose people, as long as they're old.
Wasnt my intention.
It's terrible when you lose them at any age.
Just seems to hurt more when theyre young.
I lost my mother at 58; it's still hard to think about it sometimes.
My comdolences, Crazy Horse.
[/quote]
That makes sense avy and is very true. Dad was 54. You just never expect to lose a parent young so is always a massive shock when you do.
Have just read through this thread, there is some really moving stuff in here.
My mum died in June and i'm at that stage where I now just spend all of my time thinking about her and reliving all of the memories I have. We found out that she had cancer in April and in the months after I spent as much time as possible with her and I really enjoyed our time together and i'm now kinda in a place of regretting that we were never this close before we got the news.
I'm now living in what was our family home with just my twin sister and it is difficult being in a house too big for just the 2 of us that is just full of so many memories.
RIP Mum. Another one who has been taken too early.
My mum died in June and i'm at that stage where I now just spend all of my time thinking about her and reliving all of the memories I have. We found out that she had cancer in April and in the months after I spent as much time as possible with her and I really enjoyed our time together and i'm now kinda in a place of regretting that we were never this close before we got the news.
I'm now living in what was our family home with just my twin sister and it is difficult being in a house too big for just the 2 of us that is just full of so many memories.
RIP Mum. Another one who has been taken too early.
Sorry to hear that mate, may she RIP.
I don't think it's something you ever get used to, but hopefully you just cope with it better as time goes by.
The first thing is guilt I suppose; why didnt I see this coming?
Maybe I could have done something?
Should I have pushed her to see a doctor earlier?
After a while, the feelings of guilt lessen a bit..though they're always still there.
The worst thing is of course the regrets; things you wished you'd done, or not done for her or with her.
Eventually you see the logic that maybe there wasnt anything you could do; but it doesnt get any easier.
At least I hope thats what will happen.
I lost my mother in December 2008 and I'm still at the regrets stage I think.
You'll cherish what you did have though, even if you wish you'd done it sooner or more often.
Maybe in the end thats the best we can do, to try to forgive ourselves for things we know now from hindsight..and maybe cherish what you did share.
Sometimes you dont think about her for a while, but it always comes back to you in the end.
Things she used to say or do which you suddenly remember; of if you smell a dish thats similar to waht your mother used to make..or you'll see or hear something that didnt mean anything before, but carry a lot more significance now.
I watched a film a few months after she died based on a Mitch Albom book; was called 'For ONe MOre Day'..iut's about a man who's wasted his life and tries to kill himself..he fails, but is visited by his mother's ghost for a day..waht wouldnt I give for one more day as well.
BUt maybe they understand the things you feel now, even if you feel bad for not telling them before.
Things like that.
I'm sorry to ramble on, just saying that I know what you're talking about.
I hope things get a little easier for you as time passes, Bristow.
The first thing is guilt I suppose; why didnt I see this coming?
Maybe I could have done something?
Should I have pushed her to see a doctor earlier?
After a while, the feelings of guilt lessen a bit..though they're always still there.
The worst thing is of course the regrets; things you wished you'd done, or not done for her or with her.
Eventually you see the logic that maybe there wasnt anything you could do; but it doesnt get any easier.
At least I hope thats what will happen.
I lost my mother in December 2008 and I'm still at the regrets stage I think.
You'll cherish what you did have though, even if you wish you'd done it sooner or more often.
Maybe in the end thats the best we can do, to try to forgive ourselves for things we know now from hindsight..and maybe cherish what you did share.
Sometimes you dont think about her for a while, but it always comes back to you in the end.
Things she used to say or do which you suddenly remember; of if you smell a dish thats similar to waht your mother used to make..or you'll see or hear something that didnt mean anything before, but carry a lot more significance now.
I watched a film a few months after she died based on a Mitch Albom book; was called 'For ONe MOre Day'..iut's about a man who's wasted his life and tries to kill himself..he fails, but is visited by his mother's ghost for a day..waht wouldnt I give for one more day as well.
BUt maybe they understand the things you feel now, even if you feel bad for not telling them before.
Things like that.
I'm sorry to ramble on, just saying that I know what you're talking about.
I hope things get a little easier for you as time passes, Bristow.
You weren't rambling, Avvy. You were making your habitual excellent contribution to a thread on here.
Bristow, things will get easier, I promise. Something worth keeping in mind is this: the best and longest-lasting tribute you can pay your mother is to have a good life. It's what she would want for you, and it's a gift you can let her go on giving you every single day.
YNWA
Bristow, things will get easier, I promise. Something worth keeping in mind is this: the best and longest-lasting tribute you can pay your mother is to have a good life. It's what she would want for you, and it's a gift you can let her go on giving you every single day.
YNWA
They buried one of the kids today.
He was 17, passed his test about 3 weeks ago and the dozy twat went and wrapped his car round a tree.
As much as he could be a bit of a pain in the arse to teach, he was a good kid - bright, funny, charming, friendly.
I'd had a fair bit of correspondance with his Mum, because she worried about how he was getting on and that, and was worried about how he got on with the other kids because he had Aspergers (which I wouldn't have known unless she told me, and certainly couldn't tell he had problems relating to people given that he was the 'life and soul' - the number of people there today was a testimony to that)
The last time I saw him he nicked my Rizlas. It's strange how thinking about the small details like that can have an effect on you.
Apparently this happens fairly regularly. I hope not, I really don't fancy going through that every year
He was 17, passed his test about 3 weeks ago and the dozy twat went and wrapped his car round a tree.
As much as he could be a bit of a pain in the arse to teach, he was a good kid - bright, funny, charming, friendly.
I'd had a fair bit of correspondance with his Mum, because she worried about how he was getting on and that, and was worried about how he got on with the other kids because he had Aspergers (which I wouldn't have known unless she told me, and certainly couldn't tell he had problems relating to people given that he was the 'life and soul' - the number of people there today was a testimony to that)
The last time I saw him he nicked my Rizlas. It's strange how thinking about the small details like that can have an effect on you.
Apparently this happens fairly regularly. I hope not, I really don't fancy going through that every year
Sorry for your/everyone's loss, mate. (Are you in the education business?)
I've just remembered about this thread, I don't occupy the forums as much these days, seem to be all over the place.
I want to offer my condolences to everyone who has lost anyone who meant something to them, a loss is heartbreaking no matter who it is.
I've lost 3 members of close family this year, and its been the toughest year i've had in a while, its gave me a different outlook and life and matured me as a person, i've been through a lot of heartache and it's made me stronger as a man.
Funerals are things you never forget, they live with you forever, i'll never forget seeing the pain on my families faces and the tears that were shed.
R.I.P
I want to offer my condolences to everyone who has lost anyone who meant something to them, a loss is heartbreaking no matter who it is.
I've lost 3 members of close family this year, and its been the toughest year i've had in a while, its gave me a different outlook and life and matured me as a person, i've been through a lot of heartache and it's made me stronger as a man.
Funerals are things you never forget, they live with you forever, i'll never forget seeing the pain on my families faces and the tears that were shed.
R.I.P
Condolences Ijg.
Sorry for your loss. At least you seem to be dealing with it wisely and well. Thoughts and prayers for all concerned.
