Rap-off or whatever its called
- Thread starter doctor_mac
- Start date
- Latest activity Latest activity:
Was just reading through this thread again. Totally brilliant.
Might as well add a couple contributions myself from a battle with one of my best friends:
(Note: I am not racist. My friend is Asian and, thus, the victim in my rap. Just for the record, likes.)
Might as well add a couple contributions myself from a battle with one of my best friends:
(Note: I am not racist. My friend is Asian and, thus, the victim in my rap. Just for the record, likes.)
Check it Darkstar - I hope you don't give up your day job
I'll tear you a new arsehole like you got gangbanged by a gay mob
Your rhymes are quaint - but they're the work of a newbie
I'm sorry but they suck just like an infant on a booby
Don't take offence - I don't mean this with derision
But we are in a completely different division
If this were a game of footy then I'd be the mighty Pool
You'd be a bunch of kids who were playing after school
One-sided? You're Johnny Riise's right peg
I'm the Argie footy team (that's adept with either leg)
I'll tear you a new arsehole like you got gangbanged by a gay mob
Your rhymes are quaint - but they're the work of a newbie
I'm sorry but they suck just like an infant on a booby
Don't take offence - I don't mean this with derision
But we are in a completely different division
If this were a game of footy then I'd be the mighty Pool
You'd be a bunch of kids who were playing after school
One-sided? You're Johnny Riise's right peg
I'm the Argie footy team (that's adept with either leg)
So it's been a little while - I think it's time to resurrect,
But if you step into this thread then you'd better come correct
I mean lyrics that are tight and skills that are finely honed
If you don't have what it takes then you'll get yo ass owned
But we've had some new blood lately maybe one will have some style
Even if they don't you know it's sure to raise a smile
So come on all you newbies if you think you can step to it
Don't be shy and coy, think Nike "Just Do It"
But if you step into this thread then you'd better come correct
I mean lyrics that are tight and skills that are finely honed
If you don't have what it takes then you'll get yo ass owned
But we've had some new blood lately maybe one will have some style
Even if they don't you know it's sure to raise a smile
So come on all you newbies if you think you can step to it
Don't be shy and coy, think Nike "Just Do It"
Give up, knock it off, this is really getting old
You're good but not quite good enough like Luke Cattermole
Your gems are few and far between, your mind is getting slower
It's like trying to find a skinny dude in Western Samoa
There's only so long that the fruits of past success will appease
As you get progressively worse like a terminal disease.
So seriously single, just let the thread lie
It is withered and decrepit and it's time to let it die
Wake up, smell the coffee, there's no chance it can survive
Yet like a wicked life support machine, you're keeping it alive
Many moons ago it should have met the man in the sky
So flick the switch, it's clearly brain-dead; it's life is by the bye.
It's fitting, on the theme of death, we bring things to a close
Having witnessed the murder, of literary prose
So listen up, singlerider, you've been verbally whacked, son
Now your rap persona's deader than the legend.... Farrah Fawcett
You're good but not quite good enough like Luke Cattermole
Your gems are few and far between, your mind is getting slower
It's like trying to find a skinny dude in Western Samoa
There's only so long that the fruits of past success will appease
As you get progressively worse like a terminal disease.
So seriously single, just let the thread lie
It is withered and decrepit and it's time to let it die
Wake up, smell the coffee, there's no chance it can survive
Yet like a wicked life support machine, you're keeping it alive
Many moons ago it should have met the man in the sky
So flick the switch, it's clearly brain-dead; it's life is by the bye.
It's fitting, on the theme of death, we bring things to a close
Having witnessed the murder, of literary prose
So listen up, singlerider, you've been verbally whacked, son
Now your rap persona's deader than the legend.... Farrah Fawcett
YO! - you better back up Del, you fucking hypocrite
You're slagging off this thread when you knows you loves it
It ain't over till it's over till the fat lady sings
And from what I heard yo mama is still eating doughnut rings
Though it's old yeah it's got life like it was Nina Simone
Grabs its crotch and does the moonwalk and then says SHAMON!
But unlike old wacko jacko, my style won't be cremated
Rumours of its death have been greatly exaggerated
The only thing deceased is this so-called 'competition'
Beating you is taking on an air of repetition
So step aside a while and let a youngun take their shot
Cos you've got nothing left I've soaked up everything you've got
Your ammunition's out now you're only firing blanks
Nice try once again - I'll leave it there and say thanks
You're slagging off this thread when you knows you loves it
It ain't over till it's over till the fat lady sings
And from what I heard yo mama is still eating doughnut rings
Though it's old yeah it's got life like it was Nina Simone
Grabs its crotch and does the moonwalk and then says SHAMON!
But unlike old wacko jacko, my style won't be cremated
Rumours of its death have been greatly exaggerated
The only thing deceased is this so-called 'competition'
Beating you is taking on an air of repetition
So step aside a while and let a youngun take their shot
Cos you've got nothing left I've soaked up everything you've got
Your ammunition's out now you're only firing blanks
Nice try once again - I'll leave it there and say thanks
Will you kids just pack it in pls and do what we adults do and have an intellectual debate instead ?
*tongue firmly in cheek*
*tongue firmly in cheek*
I don't get this thread at all which worries me cos I'm in about the same age group as the main contributors.
Well, season's done and I think it's about time we brought this sucka back to life again.
Let's grime it up a little.
I got rhymes sicker than a tactical vomit
Lyrics inventive like Wallace and Gromit
When your girl hears it she's gonna be on it
Leaving you vexed wiv a bee in your bonnet
You're gonna get mad, gettin all in a tizz
It'll leave a bad taste like a mouth full o' jizz
Your dick'll shrivel up like you had a wrap of whizz
Cos you know I'm Tip Top like advice outta Viz
Trus' me blud you don't wanna mess
Like the Spanish Inquisition I'll make you confess
That you ain't shit and I am the best
And anyfing you bring you know I'll molest
Gonna fuck your shit I'll rape your style
It's so childish I'll be a paedophile
I'm bringing the truth like Jeremy Kyle
So don't argue cos you're in denial
You need some help, you need therapy
If you think that you can compete with me
Yer mad blud yeah, you're fucking crazy
Even though that's a tautology
I've done my time now it's time to conclude
Like time in lieu that I have accrued
So don't be shy and don't be a prude
Get involved just make sure it's rude
And I'm out . . .
Let's grime it up a little.
I got rhymes sicker than a tactical vomit
Lyrics inventive like Wallace and Gromit
When your girl hears it she's gonna be on it
Leaving you vexed wiv a bee in your bonnet
You're gonna get mad, gettin all in a tizz
It'll leave a bad taste like a mouth full o' jizz
Your dick'll shrivel up like you had a wrap of whizz
Cos you know I'm Tip Top like advice outta Viz
Trus' me blud you don't wanna mess
Like the Spanish Inquisition I'll make you confess
That you ain't shit and I am the best
And anyfing you bring you know I'll molest
Gonna fuck your shit I'll rape your style
It's so childish I'll be a paedophile
I'm bringing the truth like Jeremy Kyle
So don't argue cos you're in denial
You need some help, you need therapy
If you think that you can compete with me
Yer mad blud yeah, you're fucking crazy
Even though that's a tautology
I've done my time now it's time to conclude
Like time in lieu that I have accrued
So don't be shy and don't be a prude
Get involved just make sure it's rude
And I'm out . . .
This thread is ace. Gonna try to give it a shot.
Revive this thread again, what's up SR?
A single trick pony whose joys are few and far?
Your raps are ill, this I can admit
But I'd like to throw a challenge so prepare your shit
Yeah I'm callin you out so get ready to fry
You better hope and pray that your stock aint runnin dry
Cause I'm stoppin my lurking to attack the king
because I wana take his crown, take his throne, take his ring
I'm untouchable, I just can't be beat
You better brace yourself; Im sweepin you off your feet
You know where I'm from, I'm the best around
Bring women to their knees and send men into the ground
After I'm through with you, there'll be naught but to quit
Cuz you're lightyears behind the killer shit that I spit
When I walk in the club, keep your missus in check
Cuz I got the phattest flow and I got diamonds on my neck
Better run back to the transfer threads and cry about the window
"We overpaid!" "Judas left!" "Why did Sammy Lee go!?"
There's nothing left for you here but a thorough beating
You know when I'm done here its your pride I will be eating
Its time for me to get involved, the steward's time is done
You got to pretend but now its time to end the fun
It only takes one hand to give you a spank
cuz I just wrecked this verse while I'm having a wank ;D
Revive this thread again, what's up SR?
A single trick pony whose joys are few and far?
Your raps are ill, this I can admit
But I'd like to throw a challenge so prepare your shit
Yeah I'm callin you out so get ready to fry
You better hope and pray that your stock aint runnin dry
Cause I'm stoppin my lurking to attack the king
because I wana take his crown, take his throne, take his ring
I'm untouchable, I just can't be beat
You better brace yourself; Im sweepin you off your feet
You know where I'm from, I'm the best around
Bring women to their knees and send men into the ground
After I'm through with you, there'll be naught but to quit
Cuz you're lightyears behind the killer shit that I spit
When I walk in the club, keep your missus in check
Cuz I got the phattest flow and I got diamonds on my neck
Better run back to the transfer threads and cry about the window
"We overpaid!" "Judas left!" "Why did Sammy Lee go!?"
There's nothing left for you here but a thorough beating
You know when I'm done here its your pride I will be eating
Its time for me to get involved, the steward's time is done
You got to pretend but now its time to end the fun
It only takes one hand to give you a spank
cuz I just wrecked this verse while I'm having a wank ;D
Nice Rappin. But you're mistaken about SR being the King. I am, and have always been, the king of this thread.
Lo siento, el king, I thought you'd gone underground
Now it seems you've turned up in the rap game's lost and found
Now whoever is the king, they'll be taken off their seat
Cuz I am YNWA, and I just cant be beat
I drop a mad flow while you're soundin obtuse
Didn't wait for a reply, just went and made it a deuce
I am the one and only and who I am is simple
Call me a pseudonym, I'd rather call me a nympho
You think your flows ill that you got this in the bag
but while you're typin your reply; its your bird i shag
I rap and I rap; never exhaust my bank
So back down all, this is a rapping Yank.
Now it seems you've turned up in the rap game's lost and found
Now whoever is the king, they'll be taken off their seat
Cuz I am YNWA, and I just cant be beat
I drop a mad flow while you're soundin obtuse
Didn't wait for a reply, just went and made it a deuce
I am the one and only and who I am is simple
Call me a pseudonym, I'd rather call me a nympho
You think your flows ill that you got this in the bag
but while you're typin your reply; its your bird i shag
I rap and I rap; never exhaust my bank
So back down all, this is a rapping Yank.
Aha!
You'll never walk alone, but can you walk the walk?
You try and talk the talk, but when I talk you'll baulk
At the eloquence and rhythm that I bring in here
You gots to crouch in fear, because you got too near
To this incandescent style s'like a reactor core
So are you really sure, that you want some more?
Cos I can do this shit e-ver-y day of the week
Even an uber-geek, can see my shit's unique
*breakdown*
I see off every challenger, you fuck wi' me I'll damage ya, leave you for the scavengers
*breakdown*
I make shit that you can't define, create a new paradigm to take out each foe o' mine
*breakdown*
I pity fools who try to step to me, I welcome them receptively but they're out of their depth you see
So who'd you say you were? You say you can't be beat?
It's time to meet and greet, your new friend defeat
Cos when you coming at the king they say you best not miss
But it was quite remiss, the way you aimed your diss
It fell upon my ears like water onto a duck
Oh shit you're out of luck, cos I don't give a fuck
You say you want to take me, say you want my ring
Dude that ain't my thing, shit ain't happening
*breakdown*
Cos I AM the undisputed, my reign is un-refuted and your rhymes are convoluted
*breakdown*
I take out all of my enemies, dispatch like a delivery these verbalised atrocities
*breakdown*
You need more that much is evident, to get me out retirement, you shoulda checked the precedent
*breakdown*
My last words and no they're not an epitaph, but more of an epiphany this ain't the last you seen o' me
You'll never walk alone, but can you walk the walk?
You try and talk the talk, but when I talk you'll baulk
At the eloquence and rhythm that I bring in here
You gots to crouch in fear, because you got too near
To this incandescent style s'like a reactor core
So are you really sure, that you want some more?
Cos I can do this shit e-ver-y day of the week
Even an uber-geek, can see my shit's unique
*breakdown*
I see off every challenger, you fuck wi' me I'll damage ya, leave you for the scavengers
*breakdown*
I make shit that you can't define, create a new paradigm to take out each foe o' mine
*breakdown*
I pity fools who try to step to me, I welcome them receptively but they're out of their depth you see
So who'd you say you were? You say you can't be beat?
It's time to meet and greet, your new friend defeat
Cos when you coming at the king they say you best not miss
But it was quite remiss, the way you aimed your diss
It fell upon my ears like water onto a duck
Oh shit you're out of luck, cos I don't give a fuck
You say you want to take me, say you want my ring
Dude that ain't my thing, shit ain't happening
*breakdown*
Cos I AM the undisputed, my reign is un-refuted and your rhymes are convoluted
*breakdown*
I take out all of my enemies, dispatch like a delivery these verbalised atrocities
*breakdown*
You need more that much is evident, to get me out retirement, you shoulda checked the precedent
*breakdown*
My last words and no they're not an epitaph, but more of an epiphany this ain't the last you seen o' me
**thunderous applause**
A challenger i am? More of a Mazda man
Time to head into the fire from the frying pan
So u think u spit hot? Knockem dead, gunshot?
Your replies are automated like a cliche robot
You can call me a dragon i spit metaphoric fire
spark this game to life, im electric, live wire
call me outsourcing, forcing you to retire
call me anything but great and ill call you a liar
haters can hate but i just rep my golden state
you tricks wasting time, i stay on my grind, hockey skate
i eat up all my enemies, my hunger i can't Sate
To be the greatest rapper's my obtainable fate
hold on, i got your girl moaning on the other line
just give me 15 minutes, you know what'll be mine
cuz im not gonna decline when shes dropping these signs
Call me a seaman, ill shoot her full of my brine *wink*
A vision from your past, the source you'll never guess
Go back a couple pages, take a look at the best
the heaviest hitter and no ppitcher will mess
i got a load on my chest something i must confess
a little time around and its my praises you'll sing
Challengers from all around my reputation brings
my story it is chronicled in lord of the rings
cuz barclays bros is back, its the return of the king!
Time to head into the fire from the frying pan
So u think u spit hot? Knockem dead, gunshot?
Your replies are automated like a cliche robot
You can call me a dragon i spit metaphoric fire
spark this game to life, im electric, live wire
call me outsourcing, forcing you to retire
call me anything but great and ill call you a liar
haters can hate but i just rep my golden state
you tricks wasting time, i stay on my grind, hockey skate
i eat up all my enemies, my hunger i can't Sate
To be the greatest rapper's my obtainable fate
hold on, i got your girl moaning on the other line
just give me 15 minutes, you know what'll be mine
cuz im not gonna decline when shes dropping these signs
Call me a seaman, ill shoot her full of my brine *wink*
A vision from your past, the source you'll never guess
Go back a couple pages, take a look at the best
the heaviest hitter and no ppitcher will mess
i got a load on my chest something i must confess
a little time around and its my praises you'll sing
Challengers from all around my reputation brings
my story it is chronicled in lord of the rings
cuz barclays bros is back, its the return of the king!
You ain't a Mazda, that shit is far too reliable
You like a Lada or a Trabant, you know it's undeniable
A dragon you say? Or an electric live wire?
You more like a fuckin Hobbit that be livin in the Shire
I'm talkin backwards, short and fucked up on weed
And to mix my references I'm about to plant a seed
Like Inception, you lost without your little totem
You always try and bite my lines the minute that I wrote 'em
The load upon your chest is what you just ejaculated
My hunger for your rhymes has been completely satiated
You and Barclay's Bros, your punk-ass alter-ego
Can come back later for some more, but now I gotta go
Dinner's up
You like a Lada or a Trabant, you know it's undeniable
A dragon you say? Or an electric live wire?
You more like a fuckin Hobbit that be livin in the Shire
I'm talkin backwards, short and fucked up on weed
And to mix my references I'm about to plant a seed
Like Inception, you lost without your little totem
You always try and bite my lines the minute that I wrote 'em
The load upon your chest is what you just ejaculated
My hunger for your rhymes has been completely satiated
You and Barclay's Bros, your punk-ass alter-ego
Can come back later for some more, but now I gotta go
Dinner's up
Now that you know I am BarclaysBros, I think its time to come out and say that the other team I support is LA Galaxy
Sheeat. SR is jolly good at this.
Single dick rider is out of time!
I think it's about time i start to rhyme!
I've got more skills than a qualified tradesman
I'm Tom cruise while you look like rainman
I think it's about time i start to rhyme!
I've got more skills than a qualified tradesman
I'm Tom cruise while you look like rainman
[quote author=Mistadobalina link=topic=20140.msg1362159#msg1362159 date=1310176838]
Single dick rider[/quote]
Its more than one dick, more than the legs on a spider
It's common knowledge that his name is multi dick rider
Single dick rider[/quote]
Its more than one dick, more than the legs on a spider
It's common knowledge that his name is multi dick rider
Taking it in a chap-hop direction:
Gentlemen - apologies for my apparent failure
To reply to you two sooner for you see I'm in Australia
But though my new location might be antipodean
My quality control is as tight as a Korean
Manufacturer of goods that are hi-tech/electronic
But everybody knows my product is the finest sonic
Delicacy that's to be had, tis so fine it's world renowned
Whereas I'm sorry to report your reps are nowhere to be found
So run along you fools, may you both be on your way
You're both so frightfully dull I have nothing left to say
Except maybe to chide, to lambast and reprimand
What the hell were you two thinking, this thread's in my command
Gentlemen - apologies for my apparent failure
To reply to you two sooner for you see I'm in Australia
But though my new location might be antipodean
My quality control is as tight as a Korean
Manufacturer of goods that are hi-tech/electronic
But everybody knows my product is the finest sonic
Delicacy that's to be had, tis so fine it's world renowned
Whereas I'm sorry to report your reps are nowhere to be found
So run along you fools, may you both be on your way
You're both so frightfully dull I have nothing left to say
Except maybe to chide, to lambast and reprimand
What the hell were you two thinking, this thread's in my command
I don't know what chap hopping is. Did I just get chap-hopped?
With all this bragging bout bitches and hos
only my lucky wife gets to see me without clothes
While you are off out contracting STDs
breakfast in bed from my good lady
Monogamy motherfucker.
With all this bragging bout bitches and hos
only my lucky wife gets to see me without clothes
While you are off out contracting STDs
breakfast in bed from my good lady
Monogamy motherfucker.
The only one you faithful to's ya Pam o' ya Hand
She like inseparable from ya favourite gland
But I believe variety's the spice of life
You better hide yo kids and hide yo wife
Cos I be rapin e'rybody up in here
My rhymes be so fucked up they molest yo ear
My lyrical dick'll tickle bits o' ya brain
Send ya limbic system totally insane
She like inseparable from ya favourite gland
But I believe variety's the spice of life
You better hide yo kids and hide yo wife
Cos I be rapin e'rybody up in here
My rhymes be so fucked up they molest yo ear
My lyrical dick'll tickle bits o' ya brain
Send ya limbic system totally insane
Grrrrrrrr . . . bloody posting vids from phones.
It's an English teacher demolishing a young oik in a rap battle
It's an English teacher demolishing a young oik in a rap battle
