By the way, I went to see Stewart Lee in Manc on Saturday at the lowry, so I booked a table at this place called Lime right opposite. I knew it served food and had the footy on, so I requested a table near a TV... and as soon as I booked online the greeter rang me to ask if I wanted to watch the footy or the rugby. Anyways I got there about half four on Saturday and she's organised this table in position A right in front of this massive screen with our match on. She said that I'd have to keep my voice down if we scored as even though it was all set up for Valentine's Day you can see Old Toilet from the window and it's a big Man U venue on match day.... which reminded me...
About 5 years ago I took my eldest scrote to the swamp to watch Liverpool beat Manure 4-1. It was his first away game in the league and clearly, fucking brilliant. I'd told the missus to pick us up by the lowry at about 4pm, we were all going to a party in Leeds later, and as the match was an early kick off and they normally lock you in for an hour afterwards I thought we mightnt get out until about 3.45 or something. Anywhizz we got out with maybe half an hour to spare, and walked over to by the lowry and saw that bar. I told scrote to say nothing and I'd put my best wool accent on and buy a 'parnt a cydor anna glassa curk' and we could just quietly giggle to ourselves amongst hundreds of crying scumbags. So that's what I did... entirely convincingly, and as the barman took the money and passed me the drinks he asked if I'd been the game, and I nodded, and he said 'urggh it were terrible weren't it' and something clicked and I couldn't help myself, I found myself laughing back 'no mate, it's the best fucking game I've ever been to'. Scrote looks at me as scores of eyes turned towards us, so I just grabbed him and marched out. We swilled our drinks on the way and legged it into the theatre foyer for a much safer glass of wine and a scone or something.
Anyways, the only time I've been back to that Lime Bar was this Saturday... so the moral of all of this it's a very lucky pub, and dead good for watching the match in if it's on before a show, as long as you can keep your stupid gob shut.