Let's all laugh at Everton

[gene hughes]

Make no mistake, it's vital to the future of our club that Everton's decline continues, from that perspective this was a great window.

 

[Avmenon]

The thing is, the idea that all Liverpudlians support the Bitters and that only Norwegians support Liverpool is bollocks. We know it is, the know it is.

So how do the morons get away with it?

I actually had a moron Bitter acquaintance who was bragging about how Everton was the 'local' club and I told him he was full of shit; and that his comment wouldnt go down well in the King Harry.

He asked me if it was the King Harry in Norway.

I told him; 'No, it's in Mumbai; right next to the Sandon'

 

[Spionkop69]

[quote author=Avvy link=topic=46693.msg1392956#msg1392956 date=1314887140]
The thing is, the idea that all Liverpudlians support the Bitters and that only Norwegians support Liverpool is bollocks. We know it is, the know it is.

So how do the morons get away with it?

I actually had a moron Bitter acquaintance who was bragging about how Everton was the 'local' club and I told him he was full of shit; and that his comment wouldnt go down well in the King Harry.

He asked me if it was the King Harry in Norway.

I told him; 'No, it's in Mumbai; right next to the Sandon'
[/quote]

Tsk! Everyone knows the Harry is a good 15 min walk through the crowds to the Sandon on matchday.

*slaps Avvy*

 

[Fabio]

Fucking OOTers

 

[Avmenon]

I *know* that.

I was just using dramatic effect.

Strangely enough I never did drink at The Sandon.

 

[themn]

Wool.

 

[Avmenon]

Cashmere actually..

Bahhhhh

 

[My_Blood_Bleeds_Red]

that Ross Barkley lad looks like he's got a bright future ahead

 

[themn]

[quote author=Avvy link=topic=46693.msg1392981#msg1392981 date=1314888381]
Cashmere actually..

Bahhhhh
[/quote]

Yeah, ewe reckon !

 

[Spionkop69]

[quote author=Fabio link=topic=46693.msg1392973#msg1392973 date=1314888125]
Fucking OOTers
[/quote]

What about locals who jknowingly sleep with Chelsea fans?

Eh? Eh?

 

[themn]

[quote author=Spionkop69 link=topic=46693.msg1392994#msg1392994 date=1314889344]
[quote author=Fabio link=topic=46693.msg1392973#msg1392973 date=1314888125]
Fucking OOTers
[/quote]

What about locals who jknowingly sleep with Chelsea fans?

Eh? Eh?
[/quote]

 

[SummerOnions]

I like the derby, its fucking great.

Itd be a shame if they got relegated

 

[King Binny]

This has got to be one of the longest 'defence statement' I've read.

http://www.bluekipper.com/news/players_news/3238-blue_bill_says_his_piece.html

Snippets:

'You know, I've sat with people who wanted to invest in the club and there was one guy, a very nice man, a businessman in Liverpool, and he listened for an hour and a half and finally, he said, "Bill, I don't want to be you. I want to be able to take my kids to school in the morning".'

'Andrew Lloyd Webber wrote a follow up to Phantom of the Opera called Love Never Dies,' says Kenwright, 'and before it even opened there was a campaign on the internet. They called it Love Should Die. They said it was betrayal to write a sequel to his masterpiece. And by the time the show came out it was already known as Paint Never Dries.

'That was the first show in history to be killed by the internet. It was the biggest protest campaign the theatre has known, and it was started by a husband and wife in Canada, who had never seen the show but were fans of Phantom of the Opera. They actually got married dressed as the Phantom and Christine. So that's where we are.

'Do I regret buying Everton? Of course, at times. It's horrible,' he admits. 'My mum is 93, she listens to the radio, reads the papers, she's worried sick. I've had wreaths sent to my office. So what do you think? I do wonder how long I can take it, at times.

'I remember Howard Kendall saying to me, "Never read the fanzines". That became, "Never read the letters page in the Echo", then, "Never listen to the phoneins", now, "Never read the internet". And I don't. I daren't, actually.

'Sometimes I think the problem is that I am a fan. Philip Green (the retail magnate) calls me the Romantic Evertonian, and that's me. I am what I am. I jump up when we score, I jump up when we don't score, I jump up for corners sometimes. I'm the most nervous chairman in history. I can't even eat lunch before a game and I haven't enjoyed watching us in 10 years.

'I wish I could be like some of the other guys and take it in my stride, but my days are governed by Everton. It is there all the time. I call it The Pain, and it is permanent. But so is the pride.

'We thought we had a buyer in 2010. There were two guys, a major inventor and the youngest executive at ICI, based in Thailand. They had a letter from a Swiss bank guaranteeing funds in the hundreds of millions. The plan was buy the club, erase the debt, money for transfers and a new stadium. I was truly happy, delirious to be honest. I was ready to go.

'They knew the small details of the club, the move to Stanley Park, the move to Kirkby. They had instructed a serious legal firm, they did due diligence, their costs alone must have been £150,000. We were six months down the line and the guy from Thailand was coming over to sign it all off.

'Then he was delayed due to the ash cloud, and it dragged on. Finally he said he was flying in Saturday, so I asked where he was staying and he said the Dorchester. But there was a small pause before he said it, a catch in his voice as if he had to think of a name, and I froze.

'I asked how he would get to my office and he said on the Tube. And that was it. We were doing a big deal for a film and I had a team of investigators on hand for that, so I asked them to run a check on these two. And on Friday a brown envelope arrived. And I turned the page, and turned another page, and with each one it got worse.

'The offices were rented, the Far East link lived in a one-bedroom flat in the worst part of the city, the Manchester guy was a small-time inventor, no more. They never arrived. And I have no idea why they did it, or how they did it. Maybe they thought they could secure the deal, then raise the funds. The problem was I wanted to believe. And I'll meet anyone if they sound straight.

'The deal's always going to be done in a week, isn't it? We had one guy who wanted to take over the club tied to marketing Everton in China. He gave us a Power Point presentation and I noticed all the players had Burnley shirts. I asked why. He said they had got really close to doing a deal for Burnley. So that was another one gone. I mean, if they couldn't get it done with Burnley...

 

[themn]

*trying not to laugh*

 

[mark1975]

Fans can be proper bellends at times though, wreaths sent to his office? I don't like Kenwright particularly, but he's dragged them out the shit and deserves a bit more credit and respect from some of their lot. I know he needs to move on and is now seen as holding them back, but they've got literally fuck all to offer. A shit stadium with an attendance that's not going to increase significantly, and a squad that needs a complete overhaul.

The 'people's club' eh?

 

[Judge Jules]

In a way, yes, when you're talking about the kind of people who would do the kind of things Kenwright describes.

 

[Jürgen4PM]

Considering where we were not so long ago i really shouldn't laugh at that, but fuck me that's some funny shit.

'Then he was delayed due to the ash cloud, and it dragged on. Finally he said he was flying in Saturday, so I asked where he was staying and he said the Dorchester. But there was a small pause before he said it, a catch in his voice as if he had to think of a name, and I froze.'I asked how he would get to my office and he said on the Tube. And that was it.


hahahaha