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Divorce... WTF?!?!

Well, it's not all been a walk in the park. The day we told the kids was probably the worst day in all of our lives. And my wife has got gradually more bitter and cold as the days have passed. She's also turned most of our mutual friends against me, but that's fair enough I suppose.

Divorce is unpleasant whichever way you look at it, but I am still hopeful that we can sort it out without things turning *really* nasty.
 
[quote author=TheBunnyman link=topic=46147.msg1375667#msg1375667 date=1312710303]
Well, it's not all been a walk in the park. The day we told the kids was probably the worst day in all of our lives. And my wife has got gradually more bitter and cold as the days have passed. She's also turned most of our mutual friends against me, but that's fair enough I suppose.

Divorce is unpleasant whichever way you look at it, but I am still hopeful that we can sort it out without things turning *really* nasty.
[/quote]

You can't really blame her mate. I do hope you can retain a good relationship with your kids though and they don't grow up to resent you. One of my mates stepkids, as he's got older, has started to resent his biological father as he's come to realise it was his dad's actions that led to the split. This is despite his mum or my mate never bad mouthing him (even though he caused a LOAD of shit as well - the natural father). The sad thing is the elder lad doesn't visit his dad any more or even talk to him - he's become angry. Maybe he'll grow out of it, I don't know.
 
My parents split when I was 10 and I don't think I ever really got over it, one thing I've learnt is that in that situation it's paramount that the kids get the full support of the parents. Try not to lose it with eachother infront of them, it only breeds resentment and certainly don't play each other off against them.

My Mum left my Dad when I was about 10, she left us and moved to London for what seemed at the time like about 6 months (I've since found out it was about half that), left a note, the works. My Dad was heartbroken when he told us. I remember her coming back to visit us and she stayed overnight, she walked into the house and said "well then", with her arms held out, I just wanted to say "FUCK YOU". Anyway she returned back to London and a few weeks passed and I guess my Dad just thought enough was enough and he went down to where she was staying and brought her home. They stayed together then for months, we went on holiday and everything seemed the norm, we moved house aswell. Then like a bolt from the blue came the sit down and talk, they were splitting up. Hard to take to say the least, it was like having your heartbroken twice. My Dad met someone else, lives a quiet life and is a good guy, if quiet and introverted. My ma met dickhead after dickhead but is now finally settled with a good guy, though it's taken some 20 odd years and all matter of hell for us to be dragged through.

Anyway, the toss of the coin, I split with my oldest's Mum when our baby was just two years old, but we all get on fantastically, both our partners get on really well, are kids are all friends too and my daughter is an angel who gets on great with both of us, she was lucky in that me and her Mum both met great partners who gave her as much love and attention as we did.
 
Okay, so i know this isnt exactly divorce, and theres no kids involved or anything (And Im a little drunk) But I have just come out of a four year relationship, which at 27 was quite serious.

And it was my decision and all, and i dont regret it for one second.

But four months down the line, i feel quite lost, and i really dont know what to do with my self. At the moment i feel like im wasting my life, and i cant shake it.

I dont know if this is normal breakup feelings, or im having a quarter life crises, but i really do feel stuck. 🙁
 
I'm sure you can shake it. I think you could shake anything. I know you mightn't want to shake it but I'd encourage you to. You and your mate.
 
[quote author=23carragold link=topic=46147.msg1379682#msg1379682 date=1313279199]
Okay, so i know this isnt exactly divorce, and theres no kids involved or anything (And Im a little drunk) But I have just come out of a four year relationship, which at 27 was quite serious.

And it was my decision and all, and i dont regret it for one second.

But four months down the line, i feel quite lost, and i really dont know what to do with my self. At the moment i feel like im wasting my life, and i cant shake it.

I dont know if this is normal breakup feelings, or im having a quarter life crises, but i really do feel stuck. 🙁
[/quote]Love you.
x
 
[quote author=Krump link=topic=46147.msg1379684#msg1379684 date=1313279769]
I'm sure you can shake it. I think you could shake anything. I know you mightn't want to shake it but I'd encourage you to. You and your mate.
[/quote]

Ha ha. See I knew I could rely on scm to cheer me up! I feel better already! (mainly cos I'm a lot less drunk) 🙂
 
[quote author=Herr Onceared link=topic=46147.msg1379697#msg1379697 date=1313281151]
[quote author=23carragold link=topic=46147.msg1379682#msg1379682 date=1313279199]
Okay, so i know this isnt exactly divorce, and theres no kids involved or anything (And Im a little drunk) But I have just come out of a four year relationship, which at 27 was quite serious.

And it was my decision and all, and i dont regret it for one second.

But four months down the line, i feel quite lost, and i really dont know what to do with my self. At the moment i feel like im wasting my life, and i cant shake it.

I dont know if this is normal breakup feelings, or im having a quarter life crises, but i really do feel stuck. 🙁
[/quote]Love you.

Thanks Oncey. Love you too 🙂 x
x
[/quote]
 
[quote author=gene hughes link=topic=46147.msg1375369#msg1375369 date=1312648036]
I shall return later today to destroy this nonsense.
[/quote]

I hope the delay is down to research and not sneaking off like a dog with tail between its legs (and without biting anyone to death or striking them hard enough to incur death).
 
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