He twice attempted to break a player's leg in a derby game. He's even managed to exasperate Roy Hodgson with his tactical immaturity. He's been hyped way, way, way beyond actual quality of content, like Star Wars spin offs and Peter Kay sitcoms. And he's about as sound a physical specimen as James Corden. And almost as irritating. Get that nine foot pole out (Oncey) and keep him at bay.