I haven't had nightmares for years and years, and for a while my dreams were quite controllable, when it came to anything I didn't want to experience. I would just seem to invent another ending. I was happy to have developed this capability as an adult.
Twice though, in the last year, I've had an actual night terror, which has left me feeling utterly awful. I just had one last night (2 hours of sleep). I wasn't even aware of what they were before, but I just looked it up. Essentially they are a far more disturbing version of a nightmare, with an extended period of not knowing you are actually awake, usually with little recollection of the dream beyond a disturbing image or two, and often with periods of sleepwalking etc.
Basically, I woke my self up screaming last night, eyes open, standing next to the bed, flailing a large pillow (brilliant defender of the household) and then punching at an imaginary, disturbing floating head. I perceived this as an incredibly real and present threat, a home invader. I don't mean I'm miming these activities, I mean I'm reacting as I would if you woke up with some hooded man standing over you with a knife, including massive amounts of fear chemicals rushing through my whole body, and actual defensive responses. My fiance woke up, understandably distressed, and had to explain, for quite a while, what had happened before I could calm down. Still, given the fact that I was actually reacting as if faced with a real threat, it took me an hour or two to get back to sleep again, and initially I was absolutely in shaking, wideeyed, heart pounding terror.
They say it's bad sleeping patterns and stress. I don't feel particularly stressed. I mean, I've been yelling at customer service people for the last week for saddling me with a 200lb piece of lawn equipment in my living room, but this doesn't seem to be cause for my brain to invent ways of torturing myself.
Anyone else dealt with this as an adult? It's fucking me up.
Twice though, in the last year, I've had an actual night terror, which has left me feeling utterly awful. I just had one last night (2 hours of sleep). I wasn't even aware of what they were before, but I just looked it up. Essentially they are a far more disturbing version of a nightmare, with an extended period of not knowing you are actually awake, usually with little recollection of the dream beyond a disturbing image or two, and often with periods of sleepwalking etc.
Basically, I woke my self up screaming last night, eyes open, standing next to the bed, flailing a large pillow (brilliant defender of the household) and then punching at an imaginary, disturbing floating head. I perceived this as an incredibly real and present threat, a home invader. I don't mean I'm miming these activities, I mean I'm reacting as I would if you woke up with some hooded man standing over you with a knife, including massive amounts of fear chemicals rushing through my whole body, and actual defensive responses. My fiance woke up, understandably distressed, and had to explain, for quite a while, what had happened before I could calm down. Still, given the fact that I was actually reacting as if faced with a real threat, it took me an hour or two to get back to sleep again, and initially I was absolutely in shaking, wideeyed, heart pounding terror.
They say it's bad sleeping patterns and stress. I don't feel particularly stressed. I mean, I've been yelling at customer service people for the last week for saddling me with a 200lb piece of lawn equipment in my living room, but this doesn't seem to be cause for my brain to invent ways of torturing myself.
Anyone else dealt with this as an adult? It's fucking me up.
