That's a very fine list, although I'm not sure Andy really had that great a reputation, nor did Joe Allen (ignoring Rodgers) really. No idea about Ilori.
Of course, I like it because you have included one of my very first bete noires - the utterly fucking useless cunt that was Chris Kirkland.
Signed after a gloriously rubbish season with his relegated club Coventry, in a classic case of "busy goalkeeper in a shit defence can make some good saves because he has to make about 30 a match". And sure enough, he did against us, as we fucking murdered them about 4-0 at Anfield, with Heskey running riot. And he made a good save, after letting in 4.
And so Houllier and Liverpool, in a classic bit of utter fuckery, first signed Jerzy Dudek for a record fee, and then broke their own transfer record FOR A PLAYER WHO PLAYS IN THE SAME POSITION - IN THE SAME FUCKING WEEK - and made Kirkland the most expensive goalkeeper in British transfer history.
And he was young! And English! And his fucking Dad put a bet on that he would play for England one day when Chris was in the womb or some shit.
And he was fucking SHITE. And don't get me started on his bad back, or "luck with injuries". The only "luck" involved in his injuries was that he had so many, and therefore didn't play for us very often. Lucky us.
He was slow as fuck. He couldn't kick a ball more than 10 yards. He had all the agility of an arthritic panda. He looked like a goalie, because he was skinny and rangy and gormless, but he was utterly, UTTERLY fucking useless. He had one of the worst shot:save ratios in recorded history; essentially, anything hit at a moderate pace that wasn't directly at him, was a goal.
He dived for shots like a fucking war-time lookout that had been shot out of a fucking tree.
And then we have that derby game. Lee Carsley scoring the winner with a goal that could have been stopped if we'd let someone from the crowd run onto the pitch after he'd hit it, and make the save.
The first Liverpool player I really quite hated because he was just so fucking shit, and everyone seemed blind to just how shit he was, apart from me.
