Stick some of your favourites in here..
"So my girlfriend asked me where I was taking her on valentines day, apparently up the arse wasn't the right answer.."
"There's a sign on the road outside that says "SLOW CHILDREN", now that can't be good for their self-esteem.."
"My sister said she learned how to swim when our parents took her out in al river and threw her off the boat. I said ‘Kate, they weren’t trying to teach you how to swim'.."
"Thou shall not kill. Thou shall not commit adultery. Don’t eat pork. I’m sorry, what was that last one? Don’t eat pork? Is that the word of God, or is that pigs trying to outsmart everybody?"
"So my girlfriend asked me where I was taking her on valentines day, apparently up the arse wasn't the right answer.."
"There's a sign on the road outside that says "SLOW CHILDREN", now that can't be good for their self-esteem.."
"My sister said she learned how to swim when our parents took her out in al river and threw her off the boat. I said ‘Kate, they weren’t trying to teach you how to swim'.."
"Thou shall not kill. Thou shall not commit adultery. Don’t eat pork. I’m sorry, what was that last one? Don’t eat pork? Is that the word of God, or is that pigs trying to outsmart everybody?"