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Kid-friendly swearing

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manwithnoname

manwithnoname

Bravo old man. Bravo.
Banned
Any parent who likes swearing as much as me must know the agonies of biting your tongue when you are dying to unleash a stream of invective, but can't due to little wagging ears

So, any decent substitutes?

I've been using 'gibbon' and 'dipstick' a lot when driving and getting annoyed, but I can't find a decent alternative for 'fuck' and it's many derivatives

Any good U-certificate expletives that you can recommend?
 
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