Kai Wayne Rooney

[Squiggles]

I know the little fucker never had a chance of being attractive, intelligent, or indeed likeable.

But for Christs sake, don't fuck up his name as well.

 

[Judge Jules]

It could have been worse. He could have been given a girl's name, like Beckham and Posh gave their youngest.

 

[manwithnoname]

Kai Wayne Rooney

Well, at least he and Colleen haven't forgotten their roots

Lots of ill-educated council estate pondlife give their children absurd names

 

[gkmacca]

[quote author=Judge Jules link=topic=36894.msg977353#msg977353 date=1257183813]
It could have been worse. He could have been given a girl's name, like Beckham and Posh gave their youngest.
[/quote]

Yes: 'Beckham'.

 

[Judge Jules]

Har de har har. ;D

 

[Portly]

Rooney deserves some credit for making Colleen have the baby on the NHS at the Liverpool Women's Hospital, instead of some poncey private clinic.

 

[Squiggles]

[quote author=Portly link=topic=36894.msg977404#msg977404 date=1257188830]
Rooney deserves some credit for making Colleen have the baby on the NHS at the Liverpool Women's Hospital, instead of some poncey private clinic.
[/quote]

Could it not have been her decision where to deliver their child?

And who cares?! We'll be praising for footballers for eating non gold-plated mars bars next.

 

[Loch Ness Monster]

When the childs' ears got stuck in the birth canal, the private hospital would have shipped her off to an NHS site with specialist facilities anyway.

 

[Asbo]

Another Scouser to join our army of independance!

Freedom for Merseyside we say!!

 

[Loch Ness Monster]

That child is a manc, no more, no less. Its' father abandoned Liverpool when he fucked off to them scummy twats.

 

[Red Mullet]

Hasn't everybody forgotten to say 'Congratulations' to the Rooneys?

 

[themn]

I can't believe we give a shit and I realise I'm adding to the problem please can we fuck this thread off please ?

 

[Red Mullet]

[quote author=themn link=topic=36894.msg977494#msg977494 date=1257199711]
I can't believe we give a shit and I realise I'm adding to the problem please can we fuck this thread off please ?
[/quote]

Fair point.

 

[rage]

any chance of a dna test?

 

[themn]

[quote author=rage link=topic=36894.msg977552#msg977552 date=1257205968]
any chance of a dna test?
[/quote]

Yes, I'd quite like to know your heritage.

 

[Squiggles]

I think Brendan's already nailed that one.

 

[rage]

oh yea - comparing me to a mass murderer. how nice of brendan. i'd compare him to a pedophile but then he'd run away again for another 6 months.

 

[The Slugmonster]

[quote author=Portly link=topic=36894.msg977404#msg977404 date=1257188830]
Rooney deserves some credit for making Colleen have the baby on the NHS at the Liverpool Women's Hospital, instead of some poncey private clinic.
[/quote]

Coz its really gonna matter in the long run!!

 

[Portly]

Actually I will come out of the closet and announce that I quite like Wayne Rooney. I think the bad press that he gets is unfair. Because he looks a bit thuggish, people assume that he is badly behaved, but there is not much evidence of that either on or off the pitch.

 

[gkmacca]

Ha ha, GaGa time again! No, whilst I'd still say there's some evidence ON the pitch I accept he has calmed down off it, and, of all the WAGS, Colleen strikes me as fairly sensible (but then I've avoided her TV and tabloid tosh like the plague, so who knows).

 

[Gerry_A_Trick]

Apparently Kai has been twittering already.

 

[gkmacca]

Yes. He's just told Stephen Fry not be such a boring little girl.

 

[SaintGeorge67]

[quote author=gkmacca link=topic=36894.msg977897#msg977897 date=1257274515]
Yes. He's just told Stephen Fry not be such a boring little girl.
[/quote]

I know reality TV has taken over, and "entertainment" is generally shit at the moment but I was genuinely stunned to see that something about Stephen Fry considering leaving twitter was the MAIN headline on BBC news page the other day. Fucking hell.

 

[Sunny]

[quote author=SaintGeorge67 link=topic=36894.msg977923#msg977923 date=1257275688]
[quote author=gkmacca link=topic=36894.msg977897#msg977897 date=1257274515]
Yes. He's just told Stephen Fry not be such a boring little girl.
[/quote]

I know reality TV has taken over, and "entertainment" is generally shit at the moment but I was genuinely stunned to see that something about Stephen Fry considering leaving twitter was the MAIN headline on BBC news page the other day. Fucking hell.
[/quote]


May as well shut down the internet now

 

[Ryan]

Other footballers' kids names..

Luna Coco Patricia (Frank Lampard)

Lorenz and Tate (Rio Ferdinand)

Roderick, Pauline, Hector and Fabio (David James)

Sancha Natasha: (Jermaine Jenas)

Jaydon Jean Claude (Wayne Bridge)

I can sorta see the rationale behind James, Jenas, Plug and the rest opting for bizarre names what with them being the blacks, but what in blue fuck is that great big whopper Wayne Bridge at? Jaydon Jean Claude? I don't even know if that's a boy or a girl.

 

[themn]

Hang on, Luna Coco ?

Luna friggin Coco ?

I take it "Patricia" is his mother (God rest her soul) ?

 

[Ryan]

His missus is French though isn't she? Kinda explains it I spose.

Wayne Bridge's bint is some pikey Billericay trollope no doubt.

 

[themn]

I thought she was Spanish ?

I quite like Jamo's. Fucking Hector and Roderick, pffft ! Someone's been wandering upon a hilltop, reading Wordsworth and Byron.

 

[gkmacca]

It's almost as if poor old Wayne has been bribed by anagram makers to add letters that allow them to find a 'wanker' in his name. 'Kai? Yeah, that'll do it!'

 

[Judge Jules]

Lampard's ex (as she is now) is indeed Spanish, and she's taken the kids with her back to Spain, so one hopes they won't have too much of a problem.

As for Bridge though, I can't help wondering if the Jean Claude bit is some sort of nod to the late and not so great JC Van Damme. Wonder what the kids who get given such crapstruck names will think of their parents for doing it when they get old enough to care.