Just reading @FoxForceFive tale about him seeing some bird with an enormous beak got me reminiscing. I'm bored of refreshing twitter on this #deadlineday and so I felt like sharing a tale to pass the time. Just to throw the question out there - Have you been out with someone that you were completely not attracted to? I bloody well have.
I got set up once with this Canadian honey. She was nice to talk to and very pretty to look at so I thought yeah why not give it a go. A couple of dates in and I'm starting to worry she's not my type. Nice girl but no real spark. Her mate was secretly telling me that after each date that she really liked me and was looking forward taking things further. Who am I to look a gift horse in the mouth?! So it was all arranged we'd go out on a date and she was coming back to my place - Well things took there natural course and before long we were stripping down. Then I got a bit of a shock (no there wasn't a cock there if that was what you were thinking!)
It looked like her norks had been hacked up by Freddy Kruger! There were scars of over those puppies! Anyway I was a bit shocked but carried on for a bit but I really had to address the elephant in the room. I mean WTF!
I say *pointing at them* - "So what the fuck happened here then?"
She went on to explain that she had to have a breast reduction as she wanted to pursue a career in tennis and basically those DD's were getting in the way! I'm like "fucking hell you swapped DD fun bags for something that looks like a butcher has had a hack at them" (not quite like that of course but that was the general jist)
I finished the job that night of course and even ended up seeing her for a few months but I just couldn't fancy her at all. The one good thing was she used to speak French while banging away so I suppose that's why it lasted longer. Still the tragedy of those norks....I just couldn't get past it/them..🙂
I got set up once with this Canadian honey. She was nice to talk to and very pretty to look at so I thought yeah why not give it a go. A couple of dates in and I'm starting to worry she's not my type. Nice girl but no real spark. Her mate was secretly telling me that after each date that she really liked me and was looking forward taking things further. Who am I to look a gift horse in the mouth?! So it was all arranged we'd go out on a date and she was coming back to my place - Well things took there natural course and before long we were stripping down. Then I got a bit of a shock (no there wasn't a cock there if that was what you were thinking!)
It looked like her norks had been hacked up by Freddy Kruger! There were scars of over those puppies! Anyway I was a bit shocked but carried on for a bit but I really had to address the elephant in the room. I mean WTF!
I say *pointing at them* - "So what the fuck happened here then?"
She went on to explain that she had to have a breast reduction as she wanted to pursue a career in tennis and basically those DD's were getting in the way! I'm like "fucking hell you swapped DD fun bags for something that looks like a butcher has had a hack at them" (not quite like that of course but that was the general jist)
I finished the job that night of course and even ended up seeing her for a few months but I just couldn't fancy her at all. The one good thing was she used to speak French while banging away so I suppose that's why it lasted longer. Still the tragedy of those norks....I just couldn't get past it/them..🙂
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