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Bestest truest honest injuns rumours.

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Oncy

Oncy

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Post your weird and wonderful rumours in here. The only rule is that they have to be total utter nonsense. If you post one and it turns out to be true, there will be a forfeit.


Cesc Fabregas is Uniteds new number 7. This deal has been brewing for months, and Wenger has struggled to keep his captains mind on the job, since Fergie put in a preliminary bid. Cesc was willing to stay at the Gunners, but now Wenger has decided its time to move on so has Cesc. Wenger will be joining Man City within the next two weeks.
 
[quote author=Herr Onceared link=topic=34221.msg890457#msg890457 date=1245314149]
Post your weird and wonderful rumours in here. The only rule is that they have to be total utter nonsense. If you post one and it turns out to be true, there will be a forfeit.


Cesc Fabregas is Uniteds new number 7. This deal has been brewing for months, and Wenger has struggled to keep his captains mind on the job, since Fergie put in a preliminary bid. Cesc was willing to stay at the Gunners, but now Wenger has decided its time to move on so has Cesc. Wenger will be joining Man City within the next two weeks.
[/quote]


that is a fucking beauty!! love it!

almost as good as Torres to United..
 
It's not actually that outrageous I don't think, but a friend tried posting Cahill in a straight swap for Nani on sky's rumour bit. It's not on though.
 
Maybe it's also time for my trusted template that comes out twice a year:



.................. has been spotted at John Lennon airport. He was picked up by an estate agent dealing with properties on the Wirral.
 
[quote author=Piedro link=topic=34221.msg890545#msg890545 date=1245318958]
Hehe. Remember the Zidane one?

Thats was class.
[/quote]
That he was house hunting on the Wirral or that Biscan was the next one?
 
[quote author=Piedro link=topic=34221.msg890545#msg890545 date=1245318958]
Hehe. Remember the Zidane one?

Thats was class.
[/quote]

He almsot bought a house in Wirral though.

Soooooo close that was - the swimmingpool apparently was a bit to shallow for his liking so he headbuttet the real estate agent in despair and the deal fell through.
 
[quote author=vantage link=topic=34221.msg890552#msg890552 date=1245319163]
[quote author=Piedro link=topic=34221.msg890545#msg890545 date=1245318958]
Hehe. Remember the Zidane one?

Thats was class.
[/quote]
That he was house hunting on the Wirral or that Biscan was the next one?
[/quote]

I heard that he'd bought a house in Formby.

Unfortunately it turned out to be Bruno Cheyrou, not Zinedine Zidane.
 
I took Fernando Torres to a titty bar last night. He thinks Jurgermeister is a non-alchoholic energy drink. He can't handle his booze. He told me Villa to L'pool was a done deal. He has a weakness for young asians. FACT.
 
Spotted: Michael Essien and Ashley cole on the 11:40 out of Euston to Lime Street. Essien and Cole, both disallusioned at Ancelotti's new systems have expressed their desire to play for the clubs they've supported their entire lives.
 
Apparently rumour has it that wigan are going to sign van der vaart, sniejder, huntelaar and robben for a combined fee of 20mil and valencia 😉
 
[quote author=zlatan18 link=topic=34221.msg890580#msg890580 date=1245321895]
Apparently rumour has it that wigan are going to sign van der vaart, sniejder, huntelaar and robben for a combined fee of 20mil and valencia 😉
[/quote]

The entire club? And move the Mestalla all the way to Wigan? Nice, one way to pay off 450m in debt.
 
[quote author=Mamma Mia link=topic=34221.msg890573#msg890573 date=1245321310]
I took Fernando Torres to a titty bar last night. He thinks Jurgermeister is a non-alchoholic energy drink. He can't handle his booze. He told me Villa to L'pool was a done deal. He has a weakness for young asians. FACT.
[/quote]

Jagermeister.

Sorry to be picky but my bird sent me a text the other night calling it "Yagameyster" and it done my fucking head in.
 
Rafa Benitez has moved quickly to secure a replacement for the unsettled Argentine midfielder Javier Mascherano, after Mascherano's agent was spotted shaking hands with Sam Allardyce in a Blackburn service station.

Benitez has interrupted his summer holidays to take a bag of pebbles to the house of former Red, Igor Biscan, in a bid to convince the well endowed ageing midfielder to make an emotional return to Anfield. Benitez is believed to be prepared to allow Mascherano his £40m transfer to Blackburn in order to finance a big-money move for his main summer target, striker and war hero Edin Dzeko of Wolfsburg.
 
[quote author=Mamma Mia link=topic=34221.msg890573#msg890573 date=1245321310]
I took Fernando Torres to a titty bar last night. He thinks Jurgermeister is a non-alchoholic energy drink. He can't handle his booze. He told me Villa to L'pool was a done deal. He has a weakness for young asians. FACT.
[/quote]
Male or female?

And it's actually Jägermeister.

*Piedro, you forgot the ¨ ... tsk tsk.
 
liverpool are set to go all out in the transfer window and wrap up the signings of pato, aguero and maicon for a combined fee of 100million in the next 48hours
 
An emotional return to liverpool for former fan favourite antonio nunez. The stocky spaniard has been in superb form, scoring 2 goals from penalties. Benitez admitted the alleged 25 million is wide of the mark, but refused to speculate as to whether it is more of less. Nunez is reported to be 'not overly bothered'
 
Long serving Liverpool spokesperson Ian Cotton and former CEO Rick Parry to lauch their own takeover bid of LFC with financial backing from troubled bank Northern Rock.
 
Well Buddha has already stolen my line about Dzeko so I can't do mine now !

And Mamma Mia has probably just ensured the site will be closed by the lawyers of Fernando Torres in the coming days.
 
24g62qw.jpg


Liverpool to announce new Pink 2nd away Kit... to go on sale next week.. comes with free handbag.

This 2nd Away kit with handbag accessory (as modelled by fernando torres) will be worn in Champions league away games next season.
 
Sir Alex Ferguson is rumoured to be planning a £50 million double-swoop for Harry Enfield and Paul whitehouse, after his scouts report some similarities in their wing play compared to Ronaldo (see 4.00 mins into the footage).

[flash=400,400]http://www.youtube.com/v/y4CXY6TVBMc[/flash]
 
Liverpool announced the emotional re-re-signing of Robbie Fowler today.

After scoring a sensational 47 goals in 14 games for the Jervis Bay Kangaroo's, Rafa Benitez believed it was time to bring home the prodigal son (again).

"He's still got his touch, and am sure both him and Mikey Owen will more than make up for the loss of Fernando Torres to Manchester United."
 
[quote author=Terrier link=topic=34221.msg891061#msg891061 date=1245360311]
Liverpool announced the emotional re-re-signing of Robbie Fowler today.

After scoring a sensational 47 goals in 14 games for the Jervis Bay Kangaroo's, Rafa Benitez believed it was time to bring home the prodigal son (again).

"He's still got his touch, and am sure both him and Mikey Owen will more than make up for the loss of Fernando Torres to Manchester United."


[/quote]

One condition of the deal is rumoured to be that Fowler has insisted that he is allowed to bring his strike partner with him. In those 14 games together they combined for a massive total of 48 goals. Fowler has commented that he "would have never looked so good had it not been for Ryan O'Hare playing next to me, lid"
 
[quote author=Rosco link=topic=34221.msg891066#msg891066 date=1245361291]
[quote author=Terrier link=topic=34221.msg891061#msg891061 date=1245360311]
Liverpool announced the emotional re-re-signing of Robbie Fowler today.

After scoring a sensational 47 goals in 14 games for the Jervis Bay Kangaroo's, Rafa Benitez believed it was time to bring home the prodigal son (again).

"He's still got his touch, and am sure both him and Mikey Owen will more than make up for the loss of Fernando Torres to Manchester United."


[/quote]

One condition of the deal is rumoured to be that Fowler has insisted that he is allowed to bring his strike partner with him. In those 14 games together they combined for a massive total of 48 goals. Fowler has commented that he "would have never looked so good had it not been for Ryan O'Hare playing next to me, lid"
[/quote]

Ha!Cheeky cunt.

On a seperate note - my conversion into Dirk is complete - I'm starting at right midfield tonight. For the love of fucking God.
 
[quote author=Ryan link=topic=34221.msg891116#msg891116 date=1245370252]
[quote author=Rosco link=topic=34221.msg891066#msg891066 date=1245361291]
[quote author=Terrier link=topic=34221.msg891061#msg891061 date=1245360311]
Liverpool announced the emotional re-re-signing of Robbie Fowler today.

After scoring a sensational 47 goals in 14 games for the Jervis Bay Kangaroo's, Rafa Benitez believed it was time to bring home the prodigal son (again).

"He's still got his touch, and am sure both him and Mikey Owen will more than make up for the loss of Fernando Torres to Manchester United."


[/quote]

One condition of the deal is rumoured to be that Fowler has insisted that he is allowed to bring his strike partner with him. In those 14 games together they combined for a massive total of 48 goals. Fowler has commented that he "would have never looked so good had it not been for Ryan O'Hare playing next to me, lid"
[/quote]

Ha!Cheeky cunt.

On a seperate note - my conversion into Dirk is complete - I'm starting at right midfield tonight. For the love of fucking God.
[/quote]

Dirk Kuyt should sue.
 
[quote author=Rosco link=topic=34221.msg891172#msg891172 date=1245390981]
True.

Dirk is much better looking
[/quote]

You two gimps forget that I've actually met you and know what you look like?
 
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